Wednesday, September 21, 2005

101

Criminy. This year is nearly done. I have more emails in my inbox than there are days left in the year.
Guess I better get to work on that whole "200,005 words blogged" goal, huh? You know what that means! It's time for another one of the "random thoughts from P@ during the day" type of entries! Wheee!

I wonder ...nah. I'll save that idea for a question in a boq. That way I'll get to see a variety of witty responses.

Just as a reminder to myself, though, some keywords: All time. Rose. Number. Welcome.
There. Now all I have to do is remember to actually write up a bunch of questions sometime within the next one hundred and one days.

Breakfast this morning: Pop Tarts. Strawberry flavored. Frosting free. Two.

On TV tonight: Lost. Invasion. I don't know that I'll be able to stay awake for Invasion. Last night I fell asleep during Rock Star: INXS. (Turns out that JD did win, not the vampire. Bummer.)

I don't have anything to say right now. I'll be back later when I do.
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If there is a problem, yo, I'll solve it. Check out my hook while the dj revolves it. Heh. I'm so old.
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Autumn officially begins tomorrow. It already feels like it outside right now. It's nice. Although, a little bit chilly. Of course, it's probably a lot colder on the moon. [/idontknow]
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Need:
Haircut.
New(er) vehicle.
New computer.
Sleep.
Food.
Escape route.
More free time.

I guess that's about it. Not too much to ask, is it? And, really, the bottom four are the most important.

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Church sign wisdom!! From the church near our home, the following nuggets are currently on their marquee:

YOUR CHECK REGISTER ALWAYS REVEALS WHERE YOUR TREASURE IS.

(I don't think they're yelling. It's just that marquee letters are always in caps. Or maybe they ARE yelling.)
I think that this one means that whatever you spend the most money on is what is most important to you.Which, duh.
Of course, it's more true for a society at large. Because most people (I assume) spend the biggest chunk of their money on bills, which is NOT something they would prefer to spend it on (again, I assume) if they had a choice.
And that's not really fair either, because people DO have a choice as to pay their bills or not. It's just that most people choose to have shelter.
I forget what my point was. [shrug]

Other side of the marquee has a more ...confusing message.

YOU CAN BE A SUCCESS ONLY WHEN YOU LEARN TO LIVE WITHOUT IT

Um. Doesn't everyone learn to live without success? At least at first? I guess we're all successful, then! Wait. What? This one still doesn't really make sense to me. I hope they change this one soon. It's giving me a headache.
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Dude. South Park has had less OBINs then Sex and the City so far.
Thursday's episode of Sex and the City has paintings (paintings!!) of vaginas in an art gallery, apparently. Corporate is telling us that we have to swap out Thursday's episode with Friday's while the distributor edits the "offensive" scenes. There are times when I get so close to the breaking point with this company and with our way of living in general. But what am I gonna do, starve?

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Speaking of OBIN, here's the Guidelines that Sinclair has adopted company-wide. Keep in mind, I am not altering this memo in any way. This is what I follow anytime I view an episode of Maury or Jerry Springer or South Park or a movie to determine whether it is suitable for air...

                               Guidelines for OBIN

It is now ok to say pee as long it is not sexual (golden shower).

Nudity in Artwork is ok i.e. statues paintings. Pictures and graffiti still is questionable and will be handled case by case.

Profanity
There is to be No trace of any profanity. For example if you come across "what the f***" The "F" needs to be edited out. One exception of this is the word motherf***er...as long as the f***er part is edited out it's fine.

Obscenity
Blurred out video-Needs to be handled case by case. Sometimes video isn't blurred very well. Very graphic/animated intercourse and oral sex is not acceptable and needs to be edited out. Plastic body parts -- if someone is doing something sexual to a plastic body part (fake buttocks or doll) that needs to be edited out. (Yes, this actually happened on one of the dating shows!)

Showing a naked butt from the back, including thong underwear from the back is forbidden. Side-view is ok. Wearing a sheer cover-up or translucent fabric is ok, showing straight on naked butt skin through a transparent cover-up is not ok. Side-view is ok.

Please remember if bare breasts are blurred/covered and not showing nipples no editing is needed. Wearing a tight, thin and/or translucent shirt is ok. Showing the outline of the female nipple and/or aureola is ok, as long as it is a sold and /or translucent NOT transparent material.

Sexual innuendoes will have to be done case by case.

Showing someone touch their own or another person's crotch is not ok. Dancers can touch their own crotch during a musical number, but only for 5 seconds at a time.

Profane gestures such as "the finger" can not broadcast

Graphic and explicit discussions of sexual or excretory activities or organs -- even through the use of euphemisms, innuendo, or double entendre and without the use of profanity -- particularly when used in a manner designed to titillate or shock CAN NOT Broadcast.

Language

Unacceptable for Broadcast:


Fuck            Shit            Pussy            Cum            Cunt
Asshole        Cock         Prick             Motherfucker
Dildo            Tits            Nigger
Ass (things going into or out of - sexual content)
Dick (things going into or out of  - sexual content)

Questionable for Broadcast - handled case by case

crap (action)      Jerkoff (action)
Butthole (can't say anything going into or out of sexual content)
Dyke                  Faggot - these two are a question of taste
Should not be used in a hateful way although name calling is ok.

Acceptable for Broadcast

Bitch                Bastard               Damn (delete "God")
Vagina             Son of a Bitch     Sucks (that sucks)
Boobs             Butt                     Pee
Crap                Pissed Off            Penis
Balls (non sexual)                        Dick (name calling only)
Ass - you can say I will kick my foot up your ass

Revised 5/24/05

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God, I need a Pepsi.

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Oh. I know. I'll do a word count check. Because I want this to reach the ridiculous goal of 1235 words, so I'll see how far I am.
According to Microsoft Word's Word Count Feature, when I typed "am." I hit 4 pages, 1,112 words, 5,081 characters (no spaces), 7,068 characters (with spaces), 1 paragraph (!?) and 160 lines.
So there ya go.

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Remember - ALWAYS remember - It is ALL about money. Money. Money. Money. Money. MONEY!!!!
Stupid symbolic pieces of paper. That's what it's all about! Wheeeee!!!

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Random thought - if this entry doesn't go through, I'm gonna be one not happy puppy.

Also, it's incredibly nice outside right now. The weather is perfect. And I'm stuck inside this building for another 5 hours. *snarls* *growls* *bites at captors*
[sigh] Despite all my rage, I am still just a P@ in a cage.

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I wonder what the weather is like in Indonesia. Indonesia, apparently, is made up of some 18,000 islands, only 6,000 of which are inhabited. Dude. I would totally live on a deserted Indonesian island. Show me where to sign up.

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There's no such thing! (heh heh heh) (I'll explain later.)

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Eh. It isn't as amusing an anecdote as I had presumed it would be. But, here it is anyway. There's a guy who works here who, a few weeks back, somehow got onto the topic of religion with me (he brought it up originally). I briefly explained how I am an agnostic because committing to either deism or atheism is rather arrogant. He suggested that we some day go out to lunch if I ever wanted to discuss "philosophical matters" more deeply. (I read this to mean: "Let me take you to lunch and I'll see if I can convert you.")
Today, he asked me if I wanted to go to lunch. (We just got back, actually.)
So, the comment above ("There's no such thing!") was a play on the phrase of there being no such thing as a free lunch, and the idea that there is no such thing as god.

But. It turns out that we didn't really talk that much anyway because a 3rd person came along with us and most of the conversation was between person A and person B. I mostly sat there smiling and nodding politely. And as it also turns out, religion wasn't even brought up through the entire meal. Yay!

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Today. Is. Dragging.

Of course, the fact that I've been awake since 4:30 this morning probably plays a role in that.
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I said it before, but it bears repeating - I really need a Pepsi.

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Great. Now I've got a headache. But at least I got quite a bit of  work done!
Hmm. I do work, and now I have a headache. Connection?

Of course, I was also watching Fox News Network...
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Well, it's getting to be that time of the day when I need to wrap up whatever it is I do all day and then ride a bus home. Which means I should try and compose a climatic ending to this here blog entry, no?

Hm.

Suddenly!!...nah. I'll just wait a few more minutes, see if anything else blogworthy happens, then hit "Send" and go home.
******
Running total so far!
6 page
1,635 words
7,377 Characters (no spaces)
9/312 Characters (with spaces)
36 Paragraphs (Odd. I can only assume that that's because I went and changed the "division markers" (you know, those ***** thingies) between the last time I did word count and now.)
226 Lines

Yay! Now, if I can maintain this type of blogging on a daily basis for the next one hundred days, everything will be hunky dory.
Maybe I should write that story about Spowl. Maybe. Of course, that would mean coming up with the actual story. I've got the name. And a vague sketch of the first scene. I can wing the rest, right? I mean, that's what the pros do, don't they?

I'm hitting "Send" now so I can go home.

2 comments:

Amanda said...

I want to comment, but my brain is overloaded!

Obscenity is so random. Sometimes I wonder why people even bother. Like the time I heard an Adam Sandler song on the radio. Half of it was edited out.


Word to your mother.

Amy said...

Dude, if they're paying for lunch -- just go ahead and let them try.