Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Haiku Review: Lost - Confidence Man

Shannon has asthma
but doesn't have inhalers.
Boone checks Sawyer's stash.

Unfortunately,
Sawyer catches him in the
act, and beats him up.

Kate figures she'll use
her feminine charms to get
the inhalers back.

Sawyer says he'll give
them to her in exchange for
a kiss. Um. Really?

Dude. Both of you have
been on this island without
toothpaste for nine days.

Kate must be thinking
the same thing, since she turns him
down (for now at least).

Meanwhile, Sayid has
spoken with Locke, who implies
Sawyer as the one...

...who attacked Sayid
from behind the other day.
Heh. Locke's a con man.

As Shannon's breathing
worsens, Sayid mentions he
has tortured people.

Jack and Sayid tie
Sawyer to a tree, and then
get under his skin.

Or fingernails, to
be more precise. With bamboo.
Ouch. Finally Sawyer...

...says he'll give them the
inhalers. But only to
Kate. And again, he...

...asks Kate for a kiss
first. This time she agrees. Then,
Sawyer admits that...

...he doesn't have the
inhalers after all. Wow.
Kate slaps him, tells Jack.

Sayid gets pissed, and
winds up accidentally
stabbing Sawyer's arm.

Jack is able to
patch him up so he doesn't
bleed to death, although...

...Sawyer says if the
tables were turned, he'd let Jack
die. Sawyer's just....wow.

Oh, and Sawyer is,
it turns out, not even his
real name. Of course not.

Does Sawyer tell the
truth about *anything*? Jeez.
Okay, backstory:

When Sawyer was a
kid, his mom got conned by her
lover. Sawyer's dad...

...found out, killed her, and
then himself. Sawyer has spent
his life looking for...

...the conman who caused
so much pain in his life. And
that man's name? Sawyer.

After torturing
Sawyer, Sayid decides he
needs to get away.

He wants to map the
island, and also atone
for doing torture.

Sun finds some plants to
help Shannon's breathing. Take that,
Western medicine!

Charlie gets Claire a
jar of imaginary
peanut butter. Yum!

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