Tuesday, May 25, 2004

Mischief managed.

[Being spoiler for -Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban highlight to view]
Actually, I'm too tired to write a review that involves spoilers.
[end spoiler]

It boils down to this.

It was an enjoyable enough movie, but as is true 99% of the time in cases like this one, the book is much much more worthwhile. There are far too many things left out, or not explained well enough (unless you've read the book) to satisfy completely.

Not to say that it's a bad movie. It's worth the zero dollars that we paid, after all. And I would even say that if we'd spent 15 bucks that that would've been worth it. But overall, that 15 bucks could be better spent on the book, or waiting until it comes out on DVD. (Wherein it had better have some deleted scenes!)
Oh, all right, I'll spoiler the thing that they omitted that irked me so badly.

[Being spoiler for -HP&tPoA - contains spoilers for both the movie and the book highlight to view]
The Quidditch tournament where Draco and his goonies dress up as a Dementor to cause Harry to faint, and he uses the Patronus on them. That scene isn't in the movie.
I have been wanting to see that particular scene on film pretty much since I read it. And they leave it out! Sickening.

Other faults (it's late, an I'm in a bitchy mood):
Not enough Crookshanks.
Not enough Snape.
Where was Ginny??
Draco is whining and weak pretty much everytime we see him.
Not enough of the Black Dog.

They did have good things, though. Things which I enjoyed/felt they got spot on:
The Dementors. Creepy!
Buckbeak. Probably the best scene in the movie is when Harry rides Buckbeak for the first time.
Hermione's time travelling.
The overall feel of Hogwarts. I can't really explain it, but when you see the movie, you'll know what I mean. It felt like you're there.

Also, it turns out that a soul? It's actually just a breath mint inside you.
[end spoiler]

Overall, I'm glad we saw it, but more glad that I've read the book. At least the book doesn't leave out the good parts. [wink]

Monday, May 24, 2004

9 years.

Today is my nine year anniversary of working at KFBT (and KVWB). It's been a bumpy ride at times. There have been some memorable occasions (hitting a satellite dish with a broom, Carrie Whitmore, other things), and more than a few days when I've wanted to walk the hell out of there and never return, but overall, there's been TV. And not only that, but there's been the WB Network.

Ah, yes. The WB. That fledgling 5th network (UPN being the 6th, even though they debuted on the same day - Jan. 11th, 1995) that has managed in just under a decade to become a small force to be reckoned with.

In honor, I present to you a list (in no particular order) of every WB show that has ever been on the air! If I can be arsed, I'll put a comment or two next to the show's title.

Nick Freno, Licensed Teacher - I'm sure if I saw "Nick Freno" in a crowd, I'd walk right past him.

Glory Days

Nikki - When this sitcom wasn't being all T&A, it had a few funny moments. You know, for a sitcom. Also, it took place in "Las Vegas", which, like all shows that have their setting here, meant that it was really not Las Vegas.

Like Family

Grounded For Life- Probably the funniest sitcom on the WB. Fox dropped this one, and I'm glad they did. I'd never have seen it otherwise.

What I Like About You - I used to think Kelly (from 90210) was pretty.

For Your Love

Unhappily Ever After - When this sitcom wasn't being all T&A, it had a few funny moments. You know, for a sitcom. Alas, it was always being T&A.

7th Heaven - I don't think [sigh] covers it. I still marvel at the facts that a) it's coming back for a ninth season. (NINTH!!) and b) I used to watch it. Religiously. (hee.) My only defense is that it's like the Jerry Springer show. You don't want to watch, but you find yourself drawn to it like a black hole of craptacular tv.

Dawson's Creek - Meh.

D.C. - "I've got a great idea! Why don't we have Dawson's Creek...with politics?" [/WB Exec]

Reba - Argh.

Cleghorne! - Poor Ellen Cleghorne. Wasn't funny on SNL. Wasn't funny in her own show either.

One Tree Hill - The bane of my existence. "I've got a great idea! Why don't we have Dawson's Creek...with basketball?" ARRRRGGGH! This is proof positive that just having beautiful people on a show is not enough to make it worth watching.

Everwood - It's hit and miss with this one. Overall it's okay, and probably one of the best shows still on TV. (Which is a truly sad indication of the state of TV)

Gilmore Girls - Oh. My. God. Do they ever shut up?

Smallville - Heeeee. I got into this show thanks in large part to MightyBigTV.com. (Remember when it was that?) Anytime Lana is on it's difficult to care, but the Superman stuff keeps me tuning in. (Well, that and the Lex/Clark relationship. Oh, and Papa Luthor. He's just great.)

The Wayans Bros.

Sister Sister - I probably shouldn't admit this, but I once got goosebumps from an episode of Sister Sister.

Sabrina the Teenage Witch - Salem is funny. Shut up.

Charmed - Why? Just ...why?

Tarzan - Not even Director Skinner could save this show. The great thing was that the WB hyped it up so huge and then it failed miserably. Heh.

Zoe, Duncan, Jack, and Jane (later renamed Zoe...)

Jack & Jill

The Steve Harvey Show

The Jamie Foxx Show

Steve Harvey's Big Time - Stupid Human Tricks for half an hour. Mildly entertaining.

The Jamie Kennedy Experiment - I still don't see how anyone could not see through his "disguises", but sometimes this is funny. You know, for a hidden camera show.

WB's Superstar USA - Fuck you, WB. Fuck you, reality television. Fuck you, deliberate humiliation passed off as entertainment.

All About the Andersons

Do Over - I wanted to like this show. Maybe if I go back in time 30 years from now, I will.

Popular - Why'd they cancel this? Bastards.

Maybe It's Me - Why'd they cancel this? Bastards.

Birds of Prey - "I've got a great idea! Why don't we have Smallville...but with three women, and have it set in Gotham City?"

Dead Last - I think this show could have worked. If it hadn't sucked.

Greetings From Tucson

Black Sash - "I've got a great idea! Why don't we have Dawson's Creek...with karate?"

Savannah - This was the WB's first drama. It was a total soap opera, but I liked it.

Felicity - Meh.

Safe Harbor - A 7th Heaven spin off? What fun! Yes, let's have the Camdenverse spread. Thank god (hee) that this plan of world domination was nipped in the bud.

Hyperion Bay - This Dawson's Creekish show had Zach (from Saved by the Bell) so it was known in our household as Saved by the Bay. After watching an episode or two, it was renamed, Saved by the Boobs.

Raising Dad - "I've got a great idea! A sitcom with Bob Saget and... hey. Wait. Where are you guys going?"

Simon - I liked this. [shrug]

Surreal Life - The only reality television show I enjoy.

High School Reunion - PSYCHOTIC FREAKS!!!

Kirk - Remember Growing Pains? Hee. "Boner".

Life With Roger - This show was okay too. You know, for a sitcom.

Run of the House

The Army Show

The Tom Show

Family Affair

Grosse Pointe - Why'd they cancel this? Bastards.

Off Centre - Crass, vulgar, crude, offensive, stupid.

Brotherly Love

Brutally Normal

The Oblongs - This cartoon was actually amusing. I think Cartoon Network shows episodes from time to time.

Baby Blues - This cartoon had "It's All Been Done" by the Barenaked Ladies as it's theme song. Woo hoo hoo!

Pop Stars - Remember Eden's Crush? Yeah, me neither.

Three - "I've got a great idea! Let's combine Dawson's Creek and Alias!" Actually, that might work on a different network. Or if they tried it now.

Mission Hill

Rescue 77

Young Americans

Pepsi Smash - Heee. PEPSI SMASH!!! Hee. Of course, the fact that it's got the sponsor's name IN THE TITLE OF THE SHOW is a bit ...something. But, hey, hip musicians playing free concerts.

The O'Keefes

The Parent Hood - *looks at imaginary joint, nods wisely*

Smart Guy

The Help - Crude, vulguar, crass, offensive, stupid.

Pepsi's Play for a Billion - Pepsi, a chimpanzee, and a billion dollar pay off (that didn't happen). The ultimate in game shows. And it's coming back for another show this year! Woo!

On the Spot

Alright Already

Kelly Kelly

My Guide to Becoming a Rock Star

Movie Stars

First Time Out

The PJs

Elimidate Deluxe


Men, Women, & Dogs

Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Angel - What can I say about these two shows? They got to me. Big time. I, of course, have no way of knowing how much the WD influenced that, but I know it did. But Buffy was unlike any other show before it. It consumed my thoughts long before I found the WD. I watched both series the entire way through -(I have yet to see the explantion behind Giles not losing his head in S7, but otherwise didn't miss an episode.) something I can't say about any other show in history. (Not even the Bimpsons or Futurmama) Looking back on the shows, they're not nearly as wonderful as the first time. I don't know if it's my aging, or the fact that I "know how it ends" or if the shows just really weren't "all that" to begin with (I'm thinking the answer is "Yes"), but rewatching Buffy and Angel ...loses something. I can rewatch eps of The Simpsons or Futurama and still laugh, but don't find myself doing that with the Buffyverse.
Of course, I still watch them if they're on, but I think that it's a weaning process. The other day at work, Dopplegangland was on, and I was all meh.
Anywhat, these two shows, each having five seasons on the WB, were easily my favorites.

And that's that. Oh! A quick list of upcoming shows (they've not hit the air as of this date):
Summerland - Uncle Jesse's girlfriend has a new drama. Hmm.
Jack and Bobby - yawn.
The Mountain - "I've got a great idea! Let's make Everwood again."
Commando Nanny - Um.
and some "honorable mentions" (shows that never made it on the air at all):
Fearless - A CIA agent (who is like, 12 [rolleyes]) who doesn't have the "fear" gene. Alias for the tween crowd?
Chasing Alice - I still want this one to show up someday. Solely based on the description: A London cop, who happens to be the sister of Alice (from the Wonderland books) goes into Wonderland searching for her.

So, there ya have it. Nine years worth of television viewing. I suppose I should say something poignant here. But I got nothing.

Saturday, May 22, 2004

This entry is wizard!

Tomorrow we're going to the sneak preview of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. (And you're not! [tongue])

I'm most excited about it. I've got the feeling that Saren is, too. Harper wasn't, at first (she doesn't like going to the theater, and especially Harry Potter films), but yesterday Steph did some convincing bribery (we'll be bringing in our own snacks and popcorn), so I think we're all on board. Excellent!

I'll have to give my review tomorrow. (Using spoiler tags, of course)

In the meantime, I now present something I'm stealing from Annie's blurty.

1. Take five books off your bookshelf.
2. Book #1 -- first sentence
3. Book #2 -- last sentence on page fifty
4. Book #3 -- second sentence on page one hundred
5. Book #4 -- next to the last sentence on page one hundred fifty
6. Book #5 -- final sentence of the book
7. Make the five sentences into a paragraph

Mr. and Mrs. Dursely, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. "And I would remind you that it is not - prudent - to appear less than fond of Harry Potter, not when most of our kind regard him as the hero who made the Dark Lord disappear - ah, Mr. Borgin." Draw, you knaves, you dogs! "Hang on, I'll get my Firebolt." Instead he smiled, rasised a hand in farewell, turned around, and led the way out of the station toward the sunlit street, with Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia, and Dudley hurrying along in his wake.

Hee. Should be noted, that the first four are from the paperback versions.

That was kinda fun. I may have to revisit this exercise again.

Thursday, May 20, 2004

Angel, briefly.

Min asked in her Blurty why people aren't talking about Angel. Personally, the reason I've been not, is because I want to wait until the WD is back up. But, I must speak of it! So, here are a few of my trademark incoherent thoughts on the matter. Yay!
[Being spoiler for -Not Fade Away highlight to view]Wow. It's actually over.

And everyone (except Lorne, Harmony, Connor, and Eve) died. Whoa. Just...whoa. And YAY! And ...wow.

I knew Wesley was going to die. When, part way through the episode he and Angel exchanged that "look", and there was that music, I saw it coming.

When Connor was reintroduced, I had a momentary panic that he was going to be the one that was going to die, and I said to Steph, "If Connor is the one that dies, I will break the television." (I simply wouldn't stand for the final scene to be Angel losing his son - again.) Luckily, our television remains intact.

I don't know. I think the episode was best summed up by the demon Vail, talking about Wesley when he said - "How touching his meaningless death was."
The show was just that. Touching and meaningless.
[End spoiler]

Oh! One more thing!
[Being spoiler for -Not Not Fade Away, but sorta relates highlight to view]
"Thank you from your friends at the WB"
Your "friends"???
What the fuck?
What the FUCK??
That would be like the Senior Partners saying, "Hey, thanks Angel for all the good work you did!"
[End spoiler]

The best thing, though? My Wednesday nights are now TV free. The only shows I care about anymore are on Sunday. Ironically, I spend five other nights watching television for 8 hours.

"Goodnight, folks."

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

Computer woes

Gah. The rate that this thing is moving....

And even worse, I can't get onto the WD, wherein I have two PMs waiting for me (one from Jupe, one from Jess). I could make some kind of carrot-on-a-stick analogy, but meh.

In semi-related news, the other day we downloaded a free virus removing program. The first time we ran it, it found (and removed) 23 viruses. 23!!
It ran again two nights back, and this time only had one. Our poor sick computer.

I need to stop drinking Pepsi. It's making my belly ache too much when I drink it.

Man, I want a Pepsi.

Saturday, May 15, 2004

Time to worship Mephistopheles

Our VCR died yesterday. The cleaning head tape got stuck in there, and despite my best efforts, I could not remove it.

So, I believe we're going to finally cave in and jump on this DVD bandwagon.

[sigh] I know that DVDs are evil (EVIL!!) but we have no other option. Well, we could not go without a VCR or DVD for a while, but that's crazytalk. Damn you progress, and your non-allowing-of-true-choice ways!!

On the other hand, at least we'll finally be able to watch the entire run of Freaks and Geeks.

Monday, May 10, 2004

Ape10 episode 6:

Dead Woman's Party

From the journal of Zombielyn Monroe:

Today is the day! I'm so excited about this! My undead heart is brimming with joy and excitement!

Excuse me, dear diary, I should go back and provide the adequate backstory to what I'm talking about.

It all began about a month ago...

Spark had gone into town to look for some spare parts, or at least that was the cover story he gave me. After a half an hour, Ape10 received a phone call on his cell phone. He listened for a while, then hung up and said to me, "Spark needs some help carrying some stuff, and asked me to help him. We'll be back in a little while."

He then morphed into gorilla form. I've often wondered how exactly it is that he has that ability -along with how he can speak at all, no other animal I've met has known so much English - but I know that he's not very forthcoming about his past. And he never asks about how I came to be a zombie, so I suppose we're okay keeping certain secrets from each other. But I digress.

As I said, Ape10 morphed, and then he, too went into Azwood. I stayed in the park, just passing time, making myself look beautiful. After another fifteen minutes or so, Ape10's cell rang. I didn't realize he had left it behind, but I answered it, anyway.

It was Ape10. He told me that there had been a change of plans, and to meet him and Spark at the corner of Broadway and Maple. Concerned that perhaps The Boy had interferred again, I asked if everything was okay.
"It's not an emergency, Zombielyn," he reassured me, "we just can't do what needs to be done without you here."

On that somewhat cryptic note, we hung up, and I made my way into town.

Upon my arrival at the intersection of Broadway and Maple, I saw only one place to go - a pizza parlor named Chuck E. Cheese's. I entered the building, and was greeted by Spark and Ape10 shouting "Surprise!"

The party was wonderful. My friends really are the best part of being a zombie. The fact that a magical monkey and a robot with artificial intelligence planned for an undead movie star to have a pizza party makes life worthwhile.

The party was just as wonderful as the Hollywood soirees I attended during my pre-zombie days. Better, in many ways. There, the people would stand around attempting to be the center of attention, and ending up being entirely fake. Being with Ape10 and Spark, we are our real selves. We don't have to pretend. It's more real.

Spark and Ape10 had asked me if I wanted to dance, and I had said yes. They had gathered around me, and that was when the front doors were kicked in and three men began viciously attacking Ape10 and Spark!

I began to fight back, and it was at that moment that I recognized the assailants. They were my brothers! Lethargy, Corpsey, and Moe.
I yelled for everyone to stop, loud enough to shatter glass - I believe I might have part banshee in me - and all the fighting ceased entirely. The five most important people in my life - my zombie brethren, Spark, and Ape10, all stared at me in confusion. I stared back. I finally broke the silence by giving Lethargy, Corpsey and Moe a hug. It was so good to see them again! Even if they had attacked my companions.

Ape10 asked, "You know these hooligans?"

Moe gave Ape10 a dirty look (he's always been the most sensitive of the three) and asked me if I knew these hooligans. And then to Ape10 he added, "And who you callin' a hooligan?"

Violence, it seemed, was about to erupt again, but I intervened. I explained to Spark and Ape10 who my brothers were, and then explained to my brothers who Spark and Ape10 were. I then asked why they had come in and attacked my friends. Lethargy answered, "A young boy told us you were being attacked by a robot and a monkey!"

Ape10, Spark, and myself all instantly knew. "The Boy!"

On my brother's confused looks, I explained who The Boy was. They were quite impressed. Corpsey said, "Our little sis, freaking the establishment!" Moe bonked him on the head and said, "Knock it off, knucklehead! You're embarassing her."

Once we had worked out that there was no need for anyone to fight, Spark suggested that we continue the party, adding that there was plenty of food for my brothers as well.

We all had a wonderful time, and it was indeed nice to catch up with my siblings. It seems that the three of them own a cememtary in North Haskerville (which is about a 30 minute drive outside of Azwood). We hadn't seen each other in many years, so the nostalgia was quite thick that day. And, as icing on the cake, Spark and Ape10 got along very well with my brothers.

It was shaping up to be one of the best days of my life.

And then the wall of the Chuck E. Cheese building crumbled, and Bluebush stormed in - riding his third dinowarrior; a stegosaurus!

"Arrrhaa!!" Bluebush laughed. "I have found ye! Now behold my weapons of mass destruction!"

At that, the stegosaurus began to thrash it's spiky tail about, smashing into Chuck E. Cheese, and demolishing the soda dispenser.

It took only seconds for the six of us to decide to fight the pirate and his insane dinosaur. I think that if my brothers had not been there, Bluebush may well have succeeded in destroying us. But with the assistance of Lethargy, Corpsey, and Moe (who have always had a penchance for violence), we quickly made mincemeat of the prehistoric beast. (Quite literally.) While we were fighting the dinosaur, Bluebush quickly stepped out of the hole in the wall, as is his way. Attack and run. He's such a coward. I swear, if I ever get my hands ...and claws ...on him...

Back to the fight - While we were fighting the beast, it seemed to try to approach the desk - where the prizes are kept. At first, I thought that this was in an attempt to escape our onslaught. And while that may have been part of the animal's reasoning, it turns out that there was more to it than that. As the creature lay dying, moaning it's final moans, I followed it's gaze to the prize-counter...and saw a dinosaur egg.

It was behind the counter and available for 'purchase' for the price of 10000 tickets. The poor dinowarrior had been a mother! It had been wanting to be reunited with it's offspring! As the understanding of the situation dawned on me, I turned to the quickly dying monster, and whispered to it, "I'll take care of it."

I approached the counter, and told the clerk that I wanted the dinosaur egg. The young man said, "That's 10,000 tickets, lady."

I considered simply devouring this twerp's cranium, and taking the egg, but Ape10, having realized the situation, came behind me and stopped me from doing it. "That's not our way, Zombielyn." he said. Knowing he was right, I sighed. He then pointed to the Skee-ball machine and said, "But that is."

I smiled.

The six of us have mad skills when it comes to Skee-Ball. In a matter of minutes, we had won enough tickets to buy the dinosaur egg. And a few temporary tattoos! When we "bought" the egg, I asked Ape10 and Spark if they had any problems with keeping the infant dinosaur, rather than using the Time Blender to drop it off in history. They conferred briefly and Ape10 smiled and said, "I guess I'll be a monkey uncle."

So I kept the dinosaur egg, and have been caring for it for the past month. Today, finally, is the day that the egg is due to hatch. I should call my brothers to come attend the arrival of their new "niece" or "nephew".

Motherhood is going to be a challenge, but one that I'm really looking forward to...

Zombielyn put the pen down, closed her journal, and went to go view the birth of the stegosaurus.

Sunday, May 09, 2004


Without much to say.

The only constant.

They've changed Blogger! It's got comments now!!! (Um. Assuming it worked.)

I had a lot of stuff to say - but I'll say it later, it's not like the world's gonna change between now and then [doh2] - right now I'm simply testing this stuff out. Hurray!

Also...what? Um. Oh. I finished American Psycho last night. Interesting. Steph and I aren't sure if he really killed anyone or not.

I'm still procrastinating on Ape10. I'm gonna be up late tonight. [sigh]

Oh, and I totally need to go to the WD. It's been forever since I was there. Lord only knows what I've missed.

I think I like the new blogger stuff, though. We'll see.

Saturday, May 08, 2004

So they rode on ahead on their furry donkey.

I've taken off my watch.

I can't write. I don't know why I ever thought I could.

We started watching American Psycho today. Then the girls woke up, so I stopped it. I'll finish it tonight.

My feet are asleep.

"God there's got to be another way."

I'm hungry. And I can't write. Also, apparently, tomorrow is the one day out of the year that you appreciate your maternal unit. Go Hallmark!

Wednesday, May 05, 2004

Sink? Oh! Day. My. Oh.

I wish I were drunk.

Also, next year on this date!! Hee!

And two years, one month, and one day from now! AHHH!! I can't believe how soon that day is approaching. I've pretty much given up on writing the story, though. Maybe someday soon I'll just tell everyone the rough details, seeing how that's all that I ever got developed. [doh2]

Anywhat, I'm only blogging for two reasons.

1) I'm procrastinating on working on the next Ape10.
2) I wanted to transcribe my dream from last night.

I don't remember the details, but it was about a Native American tribe that had been forcefully removed from their land (you know, like in real life) but instead of a reservation, these people had to live in a parking garage. All of their people were forced to spend the rest of their days in a four-story concrete structure. It filled me with immense sadness that all of their land, all of their surroundings were asphalt. =(
In addition, something had been done that was affecting the births of the tribe. The women could only give birth to males. This meant that within a generation, their people would be no more.

I should get to work. New Angel tonight! Hurray!

Monday, May 03, 2004

The world is large.

Stephanie moved the world map into the living room, where we have placed all our postcards around it, and put stickers on the places we've received postcards from. Man, that sentence was unweildy. Unwieldy? Gah. Why do I keep saying things I don't know if I mean?

Anywhat, not much to blog about. We went to the library yesterday, and I checked out My Story by Marilyn Monroe. Research! I also got the 2-disc Oingo Boingo Anthology CD. ...Except that it only has one disc. Doh.
But it was quite fun to dance around in the living room today. The girls had a fun time too. I think Stephanie was simply glad that nobody else was able to see it. (My dancing is ...something else.)

I'm nearly done reading The Culture of Make Believe. I wish I had something else in store to read once I'm finished. Nothing really seems to grab me anymore.

Ooh! Email!

Saturday, May 01, 2004

Will you tell me what you saw and I'll tell you what you missed

Actually, Steph covered it pretty well.

All I have to add is this:

The ocean does in fact, breathe salty. I like it, though. Also, dropping pennies into it feels oddly ...odd.

I got sunburned while in SeaWorld. (Lobsterness!!)

Harper loves taxis. Maybe I'll get her one for her birthday.

That's pretty much all. I'm not in a real blogging mood lately. I'm sure it'll pass.