Thursday, April 30, 2015

Coming attractions

Lots of movies coming up – Some look great, some..not so much.
A small sampling:

The Avengers: Age of Ultron
Opens – May 1st (tomorrow!!)
Synopsis – The Marvel Movie Making Machine Marches on, making more money. (mmm.)

Would I see it in the theater? – Somewhat surprisingly, no. I’m sure it’ll be a great movie, but I waited for DVD (or Netflix? I can’t remember now) for the first Avengers, I can wait for this one, too.

Maggie
Opens  - May 8th
Synopsis - Arnold Schwarzenegger plays a father of a daughter (Abigail Breslin) who is turning into a zombie.
Would I see it in the theater? – If I had free passes, sure.  I’ve sat thru most of Arnold’s flicks (yep, even Last Stand) so I’m intrigued at his take on a more dramatic role.

Tomorrowland
Opens – May 22nd
Synopsis – George Clooney takes some kids on a rocketing adventure into a futuristic alternative world. Or something.

Would I see it in the theater? – Sure would! I’m surprised this hasn’t generated more buzz/excitement, really. Of course, anything Disney-related gets a lot of goodwill, so even if the movie is horrible, I’ll still see it eventually.

Love & Mercy
(June 5th)
Synopsis - Biopic of Brian Wilson.

Would I see it in the theater? - Yeah, this gave me good vibrations. (heh) But I'll happily watch this when it hits DVD/Netflix.

Jurassic World
Opens June 12th
Synopsis – Chris Pratt on a motorcycle. With Velociraptors.
Would I see it in the theater?  - Um. Does a T-rex crap in the woods? This looks like so much fun. I remember seeing the original Jurassic Park in the theaters for my 18th birthday, it would be kinda cool to see this one for my 40th.

Inside Out
Opens June 19th
Synopsis – Pixar’s Herman’s Head.

Would I see it in the theater? – I’d like to.  Pixar rarely does anything wrong (ignoring Cars and it’s sequels/spinoffs) and this looks like another classic.

Terminator: typo Genisys
Opens July 3rd
Synopsis – IN the future, an AI program called  Skynet somehow develops the ability to time travel, and figures that’s the best way to kill what it deems its biggest threat – people named Sarah and John Connor.
Would I see it in the theater?  - I sure as hell plan on it. I’ve seen all of the other Terminator films there (barring the first, cuz I was just a wee lad when that happened), so I intend on keeping the tradition alive. I was also at some point this year planning on making a blog post about the Terminator series, but all I really wanted to say in it was that it thrills me to no end that thus far, EVERY single iteration of the series has had a different actor playing John Connor.
I know that this is supposed to be the start of a new trilogy, and I can't control how Hollywood casts its films, but it would please me to no end if in the next two movies, John Connor was played by different actors each time.
I mean, dude. The whole PREMISE of the series is tinkering with the timeline. It only makes sense that one of the key figures would be effected by that. (Plus, it would explain why in T2 after they "stopped" Judgment Day, John didn't just disappear. Because, seriously. If there was just one timeline, and Judgment Day never happened, there would be no reason for T1 to have happened, which means John wouldn't exist. Unless there is ALWAYS a John Connor, of some sort.) You know what I mean?

Anyway. Yes, despite the misspellings, and that the last two installments were... not as spectacular as the first two, I am way excited about seeing this movie.

Minions
(July 10)
Synopsis - Remember Despicable Me? Here's a prequel to that.


Would I see it in the theater? - Unlikely.

Ant-Man 
(July 17)
Synopsis - I think Marvel has a big ol dartboard filled with all the comics from their history, and someone landed on this one by mistake, but they were like, "Well, we HAVE to make it. The dartboard said so."


Would I see it in theaters? - Mmm....nope. This is purely a DVD-er.

Pan 
(Also July 17)
Synopsis - Hook meets The Dark Knight.

Would I see it in the theater? - Tough call, but it doesn't quite make me want to go out and see it.
Pixels 
(July 24)
Synopsis - Aliens invade earth using video game references.

Would I see it in theaters - Nope. Adam F'ing Sandler is one of the stars, for one thing. Which is a HUGE strike against it.
THat being said, it does look like a fun, stupide movie to turn off my brain to.

Poltergeist 
(Also July 24 - July is busy!! -also, the trailer for some reason says May 22nd, but imdb says July 24th, so [shrug])
Synopsis - That's fine, Hollywood. You can remake all the 80s movies you want, so long as you remember that Back to the Future and Clue are OFF LIMITS.


Theater worthy? - not really.
Fantastic Four
 (August 7th)
Synopsis - 4 scientists get super-powered up, fight some super villain, cause lots of collateral damage.

Maaaaybe DVD-worthy. This just seems really boring. Or like it would need to be about 8 hours long in order to get everything in. Plus, you know none of the 4 are going to die, so there's no real "threat" to any of them. Yawn.

Star Wars Episode VII The Force Awakens 
(Dec 18)
Synopsis - Dude. Really.

Would I see it in the theater? - Oh. Hell. Yes.


Batman V Superman Dawn of Justice
 (March 25th, 2016)
Synopsis - two of DC's biggest heroes clash, because reasons. Or, because money. ha ha.

Theater? - Absolutely. Amazing trailer.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

I went with this one instead.

I was trying to think of what to blog about, and additionally, what to title this blog post.
Titles I considered:

Major Malfunction
Anti-social media
I'm like Shania Twain

Major Malfunction would've been talking about a dream I had 26ish (!!) years ago.

Anti-social media was going to be complaining about facebook twitter and the like. (I'm old!!)

I'm like Shania Twain would have been me talking about how unimpressed with many of my recent entertainment choices (movies, books, and music) and asking for suggestions.

In some other universe, maybe, those other blog posts were written.

We got this one instead.