Tuesday, November 30, 2004

It's been a hard day's night.

Sadly, P@ won't be blogging today. Unstead, I, UTP@, will be your host. Enjoy.

Love, UTP@.


I've ..um..been awake since 7am. Seven. A. M.!! DRAMATIC MUSIC>

Heeeee. It's eating the music.

So, yeah. It's now 11:47pm. That's many hours without sleep. Oh! Spekaing (hee!) of no sleep - last night before we went to bed, the police (all of them!) decided it would be fun to fly around our house in a helicopter. With a bullhorn. And drive by with sirens and stuff.
It probably was fun, but not for us. We were of the worried/annoyed/needing to sleep mindset.

Looking into the future...no, try that again. With hindsight (that's better), I discovered that the police (all of them!) were actually hunting for the people who thought it would be fun to rob a nearby casino. That probably was fun. Except for the being hunted (and captured??) by the police (all of them!) part.

I should have more fun in my life. Maybe I'll fly around someone's house. Or hunt for casino robbers.

So, anywhat. I woke up at the ungodly hour of seven after going to sleep around 2. I drove to pick up my paycheck and was annoyed greatly by the morning DJs on 971, the Point, talking about homework. "It prepares kids for the real world." Mmhmm.

Got paid. Cashed check. Bought gas. Verb noun.

We then drove to the really far away world of our unschooling friends who were hosting Sandra Dodd. (See my wife's blog!)

That was fun. But I didn't eat enough. When we left, it was determined that there was no earthly way I could make it to work by the required time, so the Steph opted to keep the car. Yay! I got to work quite hungry, but otherwise okay.

Long story short, I walked into the discovery that both of my coworkers had called in sick. I did the work of three people! They should pay me triple!
They really should. Because, dude. I worked like a freaking ...worker. On the bright side, my supervisor bought me dinner. And it did make the day go by much faster. But tiredness caught up with me sometime around...whenever it did.

Once my shift ended, the Steph arrived and I got in the car, and the Beatles' HArd Day Night was playing on the radio. Heeeee! You said it, British boys!

We stopped at Tacko Bell on teh way home, and ate wonce we got here, and we discovered(re) that all people who work in fast food are stupid.

Then, I read the blogs of my wife, who is funny. Then I blogged this. Then you read it. And that pretty much brings us up to date.

I was originaly(l) planning on watching Hellboy tonight. Somewho, I don't think that's gonna happen now. Becauswe(-w), it's really tired now.

Sleep is good food.

Monday, November 29, 2004

Total and complete

Lack of inspiration, that is.

I want to write, but feel as though I have NOTHING to write about. Talk about a frustrating sensation.

We went to the library today. That was fun. I checked out a bunch of CDs, several graphic novel/comic books (GEEK!), a book about the Simpsons (woohoo!), and Hellboy on DVD. Entertain my brain!


I've just been clicking around on Wikipedia. That's a fun site. Turns out that Han Solo and Leia end up having 3 children. Twins (Jacen and Jaina) and later a child they name Anakin. Also, Chewbacca dies at Vector Prime. That saddens me.

I still need to finish up the December boq's questions. This inspirationlessness has been all-encompassing. If anyone's got some last minute suggestions, you know how to contact me.

I was halfway thinking of typing up my NaNoWriMo attempt from last year. I pulled down the old notebook, and looking it over, saw that it's only 8 (written) pages. That might be too lengthy to read (let alone for me to type!) but maybe if there's enough interest. [shrug]

You know, now that the month is almost over, I got to wonder - what are all the NaBloWriMo and NaNoWriMo contestants gonna do on December first? I expect that there will be a whole lot of nothing in the blogosphere in a day or two. ;)

Sunday, November 28, 2004

Blog Challenge #4: A Picture's Worth 1000 Words

Here it is. The final Blog Challenge. Thanks to everyone who participated - or at least thought about participating, since it is the thought that counts. Of course, the other challenges are still open, there is no expiration date, so if you were simply waiting for inspiration to hit you, or until after the events of November had passed to partake, you still can.
The other challenges:

Blog Challenge #1: To comment is to reply.

Blog Challenge #2: CAST Away.

Blog Challenge #3: _'d l_k_ t_ b_y _ v_w_l.

Which brings us to this one.

The challenge is to take some writing and make it in the style of Ape10. For those not in the know of what I mean, I'll explain. Some of the words of your writing must have links to images. The images should correspond to the words, but you can be creative with it.
As for the writing, it can be lyrics to a song (which is what I will be doing) or a poem you like (bring Shakespeare to life!) or a short story or even an original piece. Whatever works for ya.
Now, have fun!

Here's my contribution to today's blog challenge.

On the first part of the journey I was looking at all the life
There were plants and birds and rocks and things
There was sand and hills and rain
The first thing I met was a fly with a buzz
And the sky with no clouds
After three days in the desert fun I was looking at a river bed
And the story it told of a river that flowed
Made me sad to think it was dead

You see I've been through the desert on a horse with no name
It felt good to be out of the rain
In the desert you can't remember your name
'Cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,la,la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,la,la

After nine days I let the horse run free 'cause the desert had turned to sea
There were plants and birds and rocks and things
There was sand and hills and rain (see above)
The ocean is a desert with it's life underground
And a perfect disguise above
Under the cities lies a heart made of ground
But the humans will give no love

You see I've been through the desert on a horse with no name
It felt good to be out of the rain
In the desert you can't remember your name
'Cause there ain't no one for to give you no pain
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la,
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la (again,see above)

Man, that took a lot longer than I had thought. Apologies to America (the band, not the country).

Saturday, November 27, 2004

exhaustion produces turbulence

Or something. I don't know.

I'm tired, have nothing to blog about, and have been in a slightly irritated mood all day. And why? I don't know.

I don't know! It's like, the phrase du jour. Say it!

I was thinking on the way home that I'm an idiot. But at least I admit it. I don't know anything. I'm starting to get annoyed with people who believe they do.


In slightly ...less grumpy news, I keep having Smallville dreams. In them, I am Clark - or at least, seeing things from his point of view - and there seems to be a lot of conflict between Clark and Papa Luthor and Clark and Bo. Other than that, my memory of the dreams is faded. As dreams are wont to do.

Ten years ago, I was all homeless. I think that may be contributing to my grumpitiaty. (That is too a word.)

Work. That, too is of the stupid.

I mean, I'm not around the girls for 9 hours out of the day. And then we sleep for another 8 (read: 10). And then I'm online. Feck. I don't know. I don't know what I'm talking about or what my point is or if I even have one.

Remind me that I have an entry to make about the FCC. OR not. God, sometimes I wonder why I bother. I think we need to go to the library again.

Speaking of identity theft, there was a story on the fucking news about a woman who committed that "crime". It was interesting - at least as far as a story on the fucking news can be - because she got a credit card issued to a NONEXISTANT person! She sent in an application with a fake name and a made up social. Huh. After that, she started using real people's names and information. And she bought a house. She bought a fucking house! Man, that's gutsy. It's also what (according to the story) led to her arrest. Greed, man. Get's ya everytime. That, or one of the other deadly sins. *chuckle*

So after that, she ends up going to jail for 48 hours.


So many things on the fucking news are pointless. I don't know.

This entry's gone on too long. I need food. And sleep. And maybe some pepsi. And I don't know what else. I don't know.

Friday, November 26, 2004


Happy Thanksspending. or Cashgiving. Or Thank$giving. I had an awesome name picked out for the day after Thanksgiving, but I can't recall it. For those who live abroad, in the United States, the Friday after Thanksgiving is historically, the busiest shopping day of the year. It's when a large number of stores have sales and the unofficial official beginning of the holiday season.

Of course, it's also Buy Nothing Day.

Normally, for us, it is buy nothing day, since we don't have the godmoney to spend. We don't this year, either, but we're going to go out (maybe) in a bit and spend anyway. Woohoo for salmon! [/cryptic (and sarcastic!)]

Speaking of godmoney, I got woken up this morning by a phone call from a collection agency. They were looking for a person with my name, who apparently owes cash to some Beach Club. I told the woman on the phone that that wasn't possible since I'd never even heard of this company. She informed me that it was located in Minnesota. Since I haven't lived in Minnesota - ever and haven't been in that state in a decade, I figured it most likely wasn't me. I gave her the last four digits of my social security number, and hooray! It's not me! Or, it's not someone trying to be me, either. This is quite interesting, because (I think I blogged about this earlier) for a while I was getting calls from Sears saying my credit card was overdue. Funny, I don't have a credit card. Turns out, they were looking for the same Patrick W. that lives in Minnesota. AND Minnesota was where our cable bill was being sent to. Hmm.

All this godmoney talk has made me think about the things that are free. The best things in life are free, as the saying goes, so let's take a look at what (some of) those things are:

[-] Air. Breathing.

[-] Water. (Well, mostly free.)

[-] Listening to your wife's placenta. (Doesn't Placenta sound like a night club? Stephanie's does. I bet the bean is thinking "Man, it's so loud in here!")

[-] Being born.

[-] Thinking.

[-] Sunshine.

[-] Laughter.

[-] Hugs.

[-] Shelter.

[-] Food.

[-] Friendship.

[-] Learning.

[-] Love.

Thursday, November 25, 2004

ric acid and natural fla

Random thoughts.

We're airing Deep Down on Saturday (I'm so glad that our station picked up the syndicated runs of Angel) and I was just thinking how funny it would've been if they'd not found Angel's lobster box for ...oh, say, the rest of the season.

Cheerleaders really do lead a lot of cheer.

DVDs have the ability to hold like, gabillion tons of information, right? Then why do movies need two discs? Or more? Can't all of those 'extras' fit on one?

We have chickens in our neighborhood. The roosters crow all the time. It's awesome. And annoying. And awesome.

We will soon have chicken in our stomach.

I dreamt about John Connor, and the future, but I don't recall the details.

Commercials put food on our table, but dear jesus could they be more irksome? (That's a rhetorical question, makers of commercials.)

Five. Five emails.

Oh! I get it! Elephants! Hahahaha!!

DNA is good stuff.

Done now.

Wednesday, November 24, 2004

Sometimes, a band just expresses it perfectly.

I know it's an old song, but it's stuck in my head.

The main attraction distraction
Got your number than number than numb.
Empty your pockets son they got you thinkin' that
What you need is what they sellin'
Make you think that buyin' is rebellin'
From the theaters to malls on every shore
The thin line between entertainment and war
The front line is everywhere there'll be no shelter here
Still burn the nightmare works you pushin' for,
I'm a snap of the whip, the true feather to tar
Memroy erased and promise gone,
Tradin' your history for a V.C.R.
Cinema simulated life in trauma
Forthright culture, Americana
Chained to the dream they got you searchin' for
The thin line between entertainment and war
There'll be no shelter here,
The front line is everywhere.
Hospitals not profitful
The market bulls got pockets full
To advertise some hip disguise
View the world from American eyes
The parmagon keep fiendin' for more
The thin line between entertainment and war
Fix the need, develop the taste,
Buy the products, or get laid to waste
Coca-cola was back in the veins of Saigon
And Rambo troops We got a dope pair 'a Nikes on
Godzilla pure motherfuckin' filler
Get your eyes on the real killer,
Cinema simulated life in trauma
Forthright culture, Americana
Chained to the dream they got you searchin' for,
The thin line between entertainment and war.
There'll be no shelter here,
The front line is everywhere.
The front line is everywhere.
The front line is everywhere.
The front line is everywhere.
American eyes, American eyes,
View the world from American eyes,
Bury the past, rob us blind,
leave nothing behind.
Just stare.
Just stare.
Just stare.
Just stare.
Or live the nightmare.

Tuesday, November 23, 2004


a) Prayer changes all (at least, that's what's said). Make a prayer all humans reading can chant.
Allah, please make earth peaceful. Amen.

e) Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies. Reveal some harmless deception(s).
Heee! Lies, eh?
Males dislike sex.
The government cares.
Societies rule! [/Jupe]
Earth's resources are infinite.
We need more reality television.
There. Five.

i) (I apologize if I induce eyerolling.[wink]) Is civilization inherently evil? Explain. (Additional brain stretching: justify th' opposite view.)
Briefly: It is.
Opposite view: It isn't.

Slightly lengthier explanation: Civilization is evil, if 'evil' is defined 'unsustainable.' Civ. demolishes life, growing & growing until it achieves ruination. Inevitable, since it is civilization's destiny.

Opposite view: Civilization yielded Simpsons.

o) Note some good songs you know. (Bonus chore: compare or contrast those songs.)
Woman, Road to Nowhere.
On Woman John Lennon croons to Yoko Ono. Road to Nowhere's more ...philosophical. Both good songs, though.

u) Quick question: Should Buffy's soulmate hunting concluded thusly: "Buffy just luvs Buffy. Dough!"? Discuss.
Soupy undoubtedly uttered: Buffy should've fucked Rupert.
Yours truly speculates Buffy's soulmate = Buffy. Duplicated.

Monday, November 22, 2004

Blog Challenge #3: _'d l_k_ t_ b_y _ v_w_l.

This type of challenge has been issued before. But! This is the advanced challenge version. Mwahahaha!

Okay. So the challenge is to write. You can write whatever you want, but to meet the requisites of the challenge, you must make sure that each word contains the vowel of your choosing. You can, if you want, do the challenge for each vowel. And, because I'm in a generous mood, I'll even provide 'starter topics' for each vowel. You don't have to use these, but I did put a lot of thought into them. And they are pretty darn creative, if I do say so myself.

Of course, you can use all of these, some of these, none of these. Whatever works. It's just that you must make sure that each of the words in your essay(s) (for lack of a better word) contains that vowel. (I feel like I'm simultaneously overexplaining and not explaining well enough. Story of my life. And also a nice side effect of being overtired.) Okay, enough explaining. Here are my starter topics. Feel free to use them. Or not.
Oh! But I ask, again, that if you do partake in the challenge, that you mention where you stole it from. AND!! If you start to get stuck in any of your responses, I'll forgive people "cheating" by using symbols (&, @, 4, etc) or even using th' to replace the (obviously that would be th' case in any of the essays other than the "e" one.)

Okay, now that I've thoroughly confused everyone out there, let's get on with this.

Starter Topics

a) Prayer changes all (at least, that's what's said). Make a prayer all humans reading can chant.

e) Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies. Reveal some harmless deception(s).

i) (I apologize if I induce eyerolling.[wink]) Is civilization inherently evil? Explain. (Additional brain stretching: justify th' opposite view.)

o) Note some good songs you know. (Bonus chore: compare or contrast those songs.)

u) Quick question: Should Buffy's soulmate hunting concluded thusly: "Buffy just luvs Buffy. Dough!"? Discuss.

Good luck, everyone! I look forward to reading lots of oddly worded phrases. [grin]

Sunday, November 21, 2004


It being a Sunday in November, there should be a Blog Challenge here. Well, there's not! Ha ha! [/Nelson]

I've got it in mind (i've had all the Blog Challenges in mind since the first one) but right now my brain and body are too exhausted to type it out. Also, I misplaced my notes, which had the specifics of this challenge written down. (You'll see)

And, yeah, I could backdate, but, even if I did that, the challenge wouldn't be ...um...challenged by anyone anyone until tomorrow, so I'll save all of us some grief and simply post it tomorrow. It's a great one, well worth the wait.

In other news, on my AOL Buddy List right now, I have zero buddies, zero family, zero co-workers, and zero recent buddies online. I do believe that's a first.

Saturday, November 20, 2004

What a drag it is getting old.

Sore back.

Pot belly.

Losing my hair.

Eyesight fading.

Tired. So, so tired.

Music sucks.


Sore thumbs.

Okay, that last one is from my playing Castlevania on the Nintendo 64 for the past hour. Which just goes to show you that you can't stay young, either.

Friday, November 19, 2004

otional benefits package

For those who are wondering, this title (and the one before it) were gleemed (gleaned?) from whatever odd scraps of paper have been lying around me when I begin to blog. It's great for coming up with titles when I have no title readily available.

I was thinking today on the drive home about how it's November 19th, and while the idea of shopping for Xmas is in the air (and on the air) the idea of Xmas...isn't. People aren't being more considerate toward one another, or smiling more or anything like that. The holiday is supposed to be something to strive for year round, and while I know that's impractical and impossible... I don't know. It just hit me how November 19th is not considered special. I can't explain it because I didn't really understand it myself. Forget I said anything.

There does seem to be something in the air lately, though. Or on the internet, maybe. Vibes are strange things. God, why do I even talk?

My stomach is empty. I've had to eat today: A bologna sandwich, two pieces of KFC chicken, some candy. Healthy!

You know what's weird? When someone you

You know what's really weird? When you decide mid sentence to not even bother finishing the thought. Well, maybe not so much 'weird' as 'annoying'. Sorry.

Also weird? Numbers.

And a lot of other things. Like, everything.

Merry November 19th, everyone!

Thursday, November 18, 2004

include bread, veggies and meat.

ANother very tired day. Tiring. Whatev.

News of the moment that made me ...happy, I guess. ABC is moving Alias to Wednesday's, right after Lost! It'll be J.J.Abrams night! Woo. and hoo.

I'm not quite UTP@, but pretty close. Be. Largh.

Let's see, what else? Tomorrow the SpongeBob SquarePants Movie opens. Hooray! Except that I'm sure I'll wait until it comes out on video. But I will see it someday.

This is becoming a very "and then I made a cheese sandwich" entry. Yawn.

You know what's hard to keep in mind? The fact that people you see on TV are just that - PEOPLE. Politicians are human! It's really really difficult to remember that that is a fact. I think they forget, too. Celebrities, models, other people driving on the freeway, news anchors, terrorists. They're all homo sapiens sapiens. I wonder why that's such a hard thing to keep in the forefront of one's brain. Everyone is a person, who has feelings and thoughts and dreams. They each have desires and wants. They all poop. They all eat. They all emerged from a mother.

I think we forget that too often. And, like I said, I think sometimes the people I mentioned forget that they are people too. Some supermodels came into town a few days back - some Victoria's Secret thing...I don't know what the deal was, it was a secret - and it just hit me that all the attention that these women were recieving (and do recieve, like ALL the time) probably made it difficult for them to remember that they're just like the rest of us. They will age. They will die. They shed tears. And skin cells. Just because they've been deemed extremely photogenic (and they were) doesn't shouldn't grant them special uberhuman privileges.
Just because politicians dress up in suits and have lots of pieces of paper...they're still animals.

I don't know. This ramblingness ties in closely with the epiphany I mentioned a few days back, but at this moment, neither thought seems to be making much sense. Guess that's because I'm a human being.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

...and there's nothing on.

I've got 57 emails in my inbox right now.

Theresa Heinz would be proud.

Randomly funny (or at least, semi-amusing) thoughts I've had in the past 24 hours:

"P@, you are a card carrying member of the philosophy of denialism."
"No I'm not."

"I fought Jude Law, and Jude Law won."

Actually, I guess that's all. I thought I had more inner dialouge, but turns out I don't. I would, though, like to fight Jude Law.

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

under the wire

Jesus, Blogger. Could you be any more uncooperative?

Bah. I have something I want to talk about, but it's long and complex and it's late and I'm not exactly in the mood anymore. So whatever.

Monday, November 15, 2004

Safe, Non-Toxic

Note to self: Don't look at sites like this before blogging. It puts you in a foul mood unsuitable for thinking clearly.

We bought a saw today. For $1.59. You get what you pay for! Unless you're a thief. HA!

You ever have an epiphany, but you don't want to share it, for fear that it will be picked apart? Just wondering. I'm not saying I've had one, simply curious if others have experienced that. Okay, I have had one.


Think I'm still not really thinking clearly.

Sunday, November 14, 2004

Blog Challenge #2: CAST Away

CAST - Continue A STory. In which a story is begun on a blog, and then continued, bit by bit, by the people who leave comments.

I've done this before, but that was back in the Haloscan days. (Heh. So funny.) The "rules" are slightly different this time. Original rules were:

1) You may add on a section up to 3 times - but you need to have at least two other people put entries between yours.
2) Don't end the story. That's for me to do.

The only difference this time is that there is no limit on how many times you may contribute. But! No double posting. You must wait for at least one other person to put up a section of the story before you continue. Don't want anyone story-hogging.

As for the (most likely) inevetiable possibility of double-posting (people putting up sections at the same time)...I don't know how to deal with that, actually. I'm hoping that it just dosen't happen.

Lastly, the "challenge" part is for you to start your own CAST on your blog. You can use the same story beginning (if you want) but it would be more ...creatively expanding for you to come up with something original. If you do, though, I ask that you please link back to me crediting me with the idea. (Only because I want more traffic and possible people adding to the story)

Okay. With no further delaying, onto the acutal story...


Paul Washington was woken up by the ringing of the telephone. A beam of almost-noon sunlight sneaked in his bedroom window between the thickly drawn curtains. Groggily, he reached for the phone, willing the hangover away. "Hello?" he answered.

The voice on the other end shouted something in German. Paul didn't understand it, but there was no mistaking the urgency, whatever the message may have been. "Sorry, dude. Wrong number." He hung up and fell back into a deep slumber.

Ten minutes later, the door was kicked in. Paul sat up instantly, heart pounding. The adrenaline raced through his body and he was sweating as three men in dark black uniforms and brandishing machine guns surrounded his bed. The men were all yelling at him, obviously irate. Paul stuck his hands up, terrified. Well, at least my hangover is gone, he thought mindlessly as his brain attempted to understand the bizarre situation he found himself in. The leader of the men poked the nozzle of his machine gun into Paul's ribs and barked some sort of question. Paul shook his head and said, "I...I don't speak German."

The leader said the same phrase again, and again poked Paul with his weapon. Paul's vision blurred and he feared he would faint. He willed himself to stay conscious and said, "Take whatever you want. Just don't hurt me. Please." The leader grabbed Paul's arm roughly. He looked at his forearm, but obviously didn't like what he saw - or as Paul quickly determined, what he did not see. All three men had a barcode tattoo on their forearms, and they were expecting Paul to have the same. One of the other men asked a question - most likely, "Where's his tattoo?" - and the leader barked angrily at him. Paul was hoping was ferevertly wishing this was all a horrific nightmare that he'd soon wake up from.

Paul protested as the leader placed a pair of handcuffs on him, but these men did not seem to understand English any better than he spoke German. "You've got the wrong guy!" he yelled, as they forced him to get out of bed. He had on his jeans, but no shirt.

Realizing that dealing with these thugs wasn't going to work, Paul decided his best course of action was to get help from a neighbor. As the men started to march him out of his apartment, he screamed, "Mrs. Johansen! Mrs. Johansen, call 9-1-1!" His yells brought his next door neighbor to her door. Mrs. Johansen had been Paul's neighbor for the past 4 years. They attended the same church. He knew she'd help. The woman opened the door, and Paul nearly did faint when he saw that Mrs. Johansen had a barcode on her forearm...

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Weekend Update!

Since I have nothing of importance to blog about today, I figured I'd read the news today (oh boy!). Just to find out what the people who control the media think we ought to know.

Here's a sampling, with some fun witty comments by yours truly following!

Dick! ~ Yup, Dick Cheney's having heart problems again. Which is surprsing to me, since I wasn't sure the man had a heart. They say that the body and mind are connected. Or maybe the Universe is trying to tell him something. Of course, if he does actually die, like the head of a hydra, there would just be another monster to replace him.

Zzzzap! ~ Recipe for disaster: Take authority figures, add tazer guns, mix in children. Stir.

Well, duh! ~ Finally Scott Peterson was found guilty. Also, why is any of this of importance? I don't know Scott. I didn't know Laci. Their lives should not be in the news. But, of course, I've tried to make this aruguement with the president and political figures before, to little avail. I just don't see why we're being told about this court case. Or any court case, for that matter. That being said, I hope they kill the fucker.

How's that War on Terror coming along? ~ I've got Rage Against The Machine's Killing in the Name stuck in my head.

Hollywood is magical ~ They can clone Tom Hanks!!

Fungus among us ~ This fungus just wanted to come to America, the land of opportunity! Soybean rust. Hmm. Well, you reap what you sow.

Micro$oft news ~ Phew! I wouldn't want Bill Gates to lose any money.

That was kinda fun. Maybe I'll make that a regularish feature.

Friday, November 12, 2004

Work kicked my ass.

I'm so bloody tired.

I have a long list of people that I would like to see fired.

I also have nothing to talk about. Blah.

Thursday, November 11, 2004

Special Guest Star: Oreo, the cat.

Whose name may actually just be "Cat!", but I digress.

Today is 11/11! Go numbers! I've altered the time-stamp to reflect and honor this.

It's also Kurt Vonnegut's birthday. Hooray! He's one of my favorite hairless apes. In honor, I'm reading Hocus Pocus which is a novel by him. I may throw in some quotes from it. If I can be arsed. [/Britishism]

Today is also Veteran's Day. Kurt Vonnegut is a veteran. Of World War 2! Man. That's like, historic. History.

Also, it's been brought to my attention that I don't speak enough of our cat. That's because he's no longer cute. He still exists, though. But he's generally pretty bitey. Or annoying. But we still love him! Currently, I have no idea where he is, but if I had to wager a guess, I'd say he's most likely sleeping in the bedroom.

In other news, Green Day's American Idiot is the album I most want to add to our collection. Go Green Day! Although, as I was telling Stephanie, the other day, I heard a radio commercial for Green Day coming in concert, and it ended with, "Green Day, produced by [name of some huge corporation]" and it made me sad that a PUNK band would allow themselves to associate with a huge corporation. I mean, yeah, Green Day sold out a long time ago, and I don't ultimately care what Green Day does...it just seems ...hypocritical, I guess, for a band that is supposed to represent an anti-establishment mentality to want money, fame, and mass marketing. Ya know?

I don't know. Hypocrites rule. I'm a hypocrite. He's a hypocrite. Wouldn't you like to be a hypocrite too?

In other other news...I had something, but I forget. Damnit. OH! I was going to ask about Attorney Generals. What exactly do they do? Are they attorneys? Or are they generals? Or neither? Is there some sort of army of lawyers out there? (Other than Wolfram & Hart, that is) And are there Attorney Corporals? And! There's the Surgeon General, too. Hmmm. Do all professions have an army? That's a strange thought.
Maybe, though, it's the wrong meaning of 'general', and there's an Attorney Specific out there somewhere, who simply doesn't get as much press time as the Attorney General.

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

You know what it's like?

It's like having 8 emails in your inbox that you just won't delete.

It's like Vietnam, all over again.

It's like a half-eaten fig newton.

It's like sitting in a car which is in a garage, with the engine running, and fighting over which radio station to listen to.

It's like a moth.

It's like the Roman Empire invading surrounding cities, raping the villagers.

It's like pizza.

It's like a cultural collapse.

It's like history repeating. Repeating. Repeating. Repeating.

It's like talking til you're blue in the face, and still having it fall on deaf ears.

It's like blogging.

It's like rigging the game in your favor.

It's like...something, that I forget.

It's like a metaphor, or something.

It's like monkeys. Just like monkeys.

It's almost like someone knows.

It's like humans and ants.

It's like a movie.

It's like a tv show.

It's like nothing before it.

It's like everything before it.

It's a lot, it's a lot, it's a lot, it's a lot...like life.

What is it like?

Monday, November 08, 2004

Maybe I should build a boat?

It's been raining for two days nonstop now. Which is cool, but a little disturbing. I mean, this is a desert, right? It never rains in Vegas. It rains on the outskirts of Vegas, or it rains in Vegas, but only for 10 minutes at a time. This has been pretty much a downpour, and pretty constant, for two days.

And the weather folks keep adding days to the forecast. "This is gonna end by Monday" they said a few days ago. It's now supposed to clear up "on Wednesday" only to have more rain show up through Sunday.

And we just lost power briefly.

There's thunder. LOUD thunder. And lightning. And rain, rain, rain.

Our back porch is totally flooded. And the power just blinked off again.

Better blog before I lose it.

Great is ok, but amazing would be great!

Which Colossal Death Robot Are You?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey

Sunday, November 07, 2004

Blog Challenge #1: To comment is to reply.

I've decided that in the month of November, in celebration of NaMeBlogWriMoSoLaTiDo, that each Sunday I will issue a sort of Blog Challenge. You are by no means forced to take part in any of them, but if one of them grabs your fancy, go for it. [up]

This being the first week, I thought I'd start with something relatively easy to complete. Commenting!

Here's the challenge.

1) Comment on an old entry in my blog. It doesn't matter if you've commented in it before or not, just find an entry that is dated before November 7th, 2004 and leave some words.

2) Comment on an old entry in someone's blog that you frequent regularly. Go through a friend's archives and find an entry that you like, then send them a note. Looking back at past entries is often illuminating.

3) Find a blog you've never read before, a complete and total stranger, and leave them a comment. If you're feeling skittish about doing this one (The Internet is populated with freaks, after all) you can leave your comment anonymously. However, if you let them know where your blog is, you might just widen your circle of friends.

That's it. I've already completed step #3, so go team me!

Oh, and of course, feel free to repeat steps 1-3 as many times as you'd like. No need to stop after just one round of commenting. Comment like the wind!

Saturday, November 06, 2004

jIH DichDaq taH pa' vaD SoH

The alien civilizations in Star Wars, Star Trek, and ...well, about 98% of all sci-fi, actually, go off the assumption that they were just like ours, and they advanced to the point where they can have space travel and whatnot.

Ignoring the silliness of that assumption, I'd like to focus on an idea that is not really touched upon by this theory. Before the Klingons (for example) built interstellar spaceships, they must have built other technology. Like, say, television.

Which would mean that they would have had television shows....

Which means that there must exist Klingon versions of Friends. Dude.


Friday, November 05, 2004

military monkey men might make movies

Yeah, I don't know either.

I saw the trailer for Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith today. At work! On our "news"!! Which is pretty darn neat, considering. The movie will most likely be as horrible as the other two, but the trailer did leave me feeling slightly optimistic that it'll be worth the 20 bucks to go see it with Steph. Only 7 more months of waiting to find out. [doh2]

Also, in case anyone was living in a cave (or, um, outside of the US...or inside the US, but wasn't watching the WB for the past two weeks or so) this Sunday is the NETWORK TELEVISION PREMIERE OF THE LORD OF THE RINGS: THE FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING. [/dramatic voice] I swear if I see another trailer for that I'll ...I don't know what. BUt seriously, I know it's impressive and all, and they've most likely got a lot riding on the amount of viewers they expect to pull in, but do they have to mention it in EVERY COMMERCIAL BREAK?

This Sunday, of course, is also the season premiere of The Simpsons. Year 16. Sixteen! Woohoo! So, if we watch any of LOTR:TFOTR, we'll be missing at least a half hour of it. Sorry, Frodo.

Question about the Star Wars ...sextilogy (? I know that's not the word (or even really a word at all) but I can't locate what I'm looking for). Are we meant to watch them in the order 1,2,3,4,5,6? Or are people meant to watch them in the order 4,5,6,1,2,3? Because if you watch them 1-6, the "surprise" of Yoda in Empire Strikes Back...isn't a surprise. We meet Yoda early on, and we know he goes into hiding. But in Empire, Luke doesn't know that the little green creature stealing his food is the Jedi Master he's looking for. I think because of this (and probably other reasons as well) we're meant to watch them in the 4-6 then 1-3 order. Or maybe just ignore the 1-3 films altogether.

Thursday, November 04, 2004

Cheaters never win.

Except, of course, when they do.

I'm cheating on the date. I didn't blog yesterday, but as Annika said, " I will allow myself to pre- or post-date entries" so I'm justified in tinkering with time. Ha! Tinkering with time!!

Um. Funny thing is, I don't have anything to say. I could talk about how Bush stole this election, too (Legitimate my ass) but I really don't want to get into political crap. The feeling of overwhelming despair that comes whenever I think about it is too horrible. I've been trying to look on the bright side of the outcome of Nov. 2nd, and while it may be a stretch, I think I've found some.

Maybe, just maybe, Bush will be what finally pushes us to Rock Bottom. Maybe, just maybe, having a so called leader make life so goddamn unbearable will wake people the fuck up. Maybe, just maybe, a cultural awakening will result from whatever travesties come from Bush & Co. Maybe.

I mean, it's got to happen eventually, right? Maybe Bush will be the catalyst. Maybe it'll be Peak Oil. Maybe it'll be global warming's effects. Maybe it'll be the extinction of some species that we vitally depend upon. Most likely, it'll be a combination of those (or some other factor I've not even considered). I also suspect that it won't happen yet. I'm really leaning toward 2012. 8 more years! 8 more years!!

I don't know. What's something more positive to talk about? Anyone? Anyone?

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Monkeys like fruit snacks.

We went to the zoo today, and I fed a Barbary Ape (which, as we know, is not an ape at all) an orange flavored fruit snack. Screw the rules, man. That monkey wanted that sugar-filled gummi concoction.

The coolest thing about them were their eyes. And how human they looked. Oh, and the fur-cleaning they did to each other. And how they leaped around. And their fingers! So humanlike! And their big-ass teeth. (Scary!) And how when the monkey I fed ate the fruit snack, he stuck his arm out through the gate in a "Gimme more" fashion. All around, monkeys rule.

Speaking of ruling, I guess there was an election or something last night. My only response to this is as follows:




I wish I could've stayed with the monkeys. They were so much better than having to go to work.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

Once more, with feeling.

Interview with the Magic 8-ball, part III.

Magic 8-ball, do you know the outcome of the presidential election?

Ooh! Now we're getting somewhere! Magic 8-ball, will you tell us the outcome?

Awesome! Well worth the wait. (I hope) Okay, Magic 8-ball, is the president going to be John Kerry?

Really. So George W. Bush is going to lose?

Will there be rioting or lawsuits or a mass exodus to Canada as a result?

That bodes well. Magic 8-ball, are you just making these results up to make people feel better?

Well, now we just have to see how accurate the 8-ball is. But, really, how wrong can a piece of liquid filled plastic be?

Political update!

Interview with the 8-ball, cont.

Magic 8-ball, do you know the outcome of the presidential election?

It's just like the media!! Only more accurate!

You heard it here first!

Interview with the 8-ball!!!

Magic 8-ball, do you know the outcome of the presidental election?

Well, there ya have it!