Thursday, April 30, 2009

Off to see the wizard

We had a rep from Sony come to the station today, giving the ...well, not the sales pitch, since we've already bought the show, but ...well, just a presentation, on the "Dr. Oz" show.
I'd heard of Dr. Oz before (mostly just from knowing that we were going to be carrying the show, and that he had been on Oprah's program several times) but I didn't know all the info about the guy. Apparently he's the one who has been writing those "You" books ("You - on a diet", "You - only better", "You - oughtta know" [okay, that last one was Alanis]), he writes a weekly newspaper column, he appears on Oprah like every month, he's a doctor/surgeon, he teaches classes, and now he's going to be hosting his own television program.
And it's like, Dude. I'm exhausted just hearing about all your activities. How does he do it??

Speaking of over-extending onesself, May is going to be ...hectic.
We have Baby 4 arriving...whenever, plus I'm considering blogging daily (although now that we're at May's door, I'm feeling much less committed to that particular goal), my supervisor is going to be out from work for half of the month due to a surgery, the upfronts happen [NBC is May 5th, the other networks happen the week of the 18th], May is the month for season finales on television, and we have to devise a way to come up with an extra thousand dollars (give or take) so that we can attend the Live & Learn Conference in September.

Hectic.

I'm sure it would be no sweat for Dr. Oz, but we'll have to see how I handle things. :)

Friday, April 24, 2009

No haikus here

I'm nearly caught up on my movie reviewing.

I don't really have anything else to say right now, but I wanted to make an entry that wasn't seventeen syllables at a time.

I have an idea (or four) for a blogging challenge for the month of May. ...that's all I'm going to say about it right now. I really hope that I a) follow through, and b) haven't jinxed myself by talking about it. Guess we'll find out in a week.

Haiku Review: Yes Man

Jim Carrey says yes
to everything, like dating
Zooey Deschanel

Was this a funny
movie? Yes (and no) Can I
recommend it? Yes!

Haiku Review: Resident Evil: Extinction

Our trilogy comes
to an end as Alice fights
the last boss. Game on!

Alice has powers
that don't make much sense, but then,
logic is sparse here.

Zombie birds are cool,
baked zombie birds are too, as
are the Alice clones.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Haiku Review: Eagle Eye

Just like Transformers,
Shia LaBeouf plays average
guy in crazy sitch.

His name is Jerry,
and soon after his twin dies,
his life goes crazy.

He gets a call from
"Big Sister" who has him jump
through all sorts of hoops.

All in the name of
"National Security".
Go team USA!

See, the computer
wants to kill the president
for not listening.

And it needs Jerry
to help it out. Thus, action!!
Thrills, plot holes abound!

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Haiku Review: Lost - Some Like It Hoth

I like puns as much
as the next guy (maybe more)
but, jeez, show. Really?

On with the recap:
Young Miles and his single mom,
looking for a place...

...decide to move in
to the complex so Miles can
chat with dead tenants.

Later, when Miles asks
his dying mom about his
dad, she says he died...

...years ago, and that
his body is someplace that
Miles could never go.

(Oh, yeah. You can tell
this is the past because Miles
has on a bad wig.)

We also get to
see how Naomi hired
Miles to search for Ben.

AND! Bram, who is with
Ilana on the Island,
briefly kidnaps Miles.

He warns Miles not to
go to Craphole, since he's not
on the winning team.

Miles just wants money
(well, that, and his fish taco)
so Bram lets him go.

In the present/past-
Sawyer calls Miles, asks him to
please erase tape 4.

But before Miles can,
Horace sends him to pick up
something. ...It's a corpse.

Miles uses his Sixth
Sense to find out how this guy
wound up DOA.

Turns out, fillings and
super-strong magnets do not
make a good combo.

Meanwhile, Ben's dad flips
out when he discovers his
son has gone missing.

Kate tries to comfort
him: "Don't worry, Roger. Ben
will be just fine. Heck...

...he will be up and
committing mass murder, yours
included, real soon!"

Roger is all, "Kind
words? From someone I just met?!?
She must be evil!"

Roger goes to Jack,
asks if Kate can be trusted.
Jack: "Welllll.... hey! You're drunk!"

Elsewhere, Hurley has
tagged along with Miles for the
corpse delivery.

The duo discuss
conversations with dead folk
and Star Wars fan-fic.

(Oh, and Hurley was
wrong. The Ewoks did not suck!
The prequels did, though.)

Everybody, please
welcome Miles into the Lost
Daddy Issues Club!

Everybody: "Hi,
Miles!" Miles (meekly): "Hi." So...Miles,
what are your issues?

"Well, my dad left me
and my mom when I was a
child, so I had to...

...learn how to speak with
dead people all on my own,
which made me snarky.

Now, through a weird twist
of both fate and donkey wheels,
I'm here, with my dad.

And I can see he
did love me as a child. So...
I guess I'm done here!"

And Hurley was like,
"See? Daddy issues can be
resolved without death!"

(Pointed look at Kate,
Locke, Sawyer, Ben, George Lucas.
You too, Joss Whedon.)

Things with Miles seem good
but Phil found the tape with James,
Kate, and Ben on it!

So Sawyer punches
Phil, and has Juliet get
a rope. Here we go!

And lastly, Daniel
is back! He returns on the
sub, saying, "Hey Miles!"

In two weeks we get
the one hundredth episode!
Can't wait to see it!

Friday, April 17, 2009

Haiku Review: Resident Evil: Apocalypse

Still not great, but it
was better than the first one.
It felt more...um... real?

I guess setting it
in Raccoon City gave it
a more 'real world' vibe.

This was a small step
(a shuffle, you might say) in
the right direction.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Haiku Review: Wanted

Lots of Matrix-y
slow-mo, but they made it work.
This was full of cool.

Curving bullets, rats
that explode, shooting the wings
off of flies, and more!

The "fuck you" keyboard,
Morgan freakin' Freeman, just
a great action flick.

Although the last line
made me want to punch someone.
This wasn't Fight Club.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Haiku Review: Lost - Dead Is Dead

It's a Ben-centric
episode, so anything
we learn is suspect.

Charles charges in,
asks Richard, "Why'd you save him?"
"Jacob wants it so."

Charles tells young Ben
he must go back to Dharma
but he's "one of them".

In the present, Ben
awakens with Locke looking
over him. Surprise!

Ben's all, "I knew it!"
Locke: "Oh Really?" Ben: "Sorta?
See, I was hoping...

...that it wouldn't work,
and you'd remain dead, but the
Island loves you best...

...but let's go see the
Smoke Monster and see what it's
got to say." Locke: "Cool."

On the beach, Ben talks
with Caesar, "Hey, do you think
Locke might be... loco?"

Caesar is intrigued
by Ben's views and would like to
subscribe, etc.

Flashback! You can tell
it's the past, because Ben is
wearing a bad wig.

Anyway, he and
teenage Ethan are on a
mission - kill French chick.

But, Ben has a heart!
(Who knew??) When he sees newborn
Alex, he spares her.

Instead of killing
Danielle, he just takes her child,
warns her 'bout whispers.

Back in the present,
John and Ben are taking a
boat. Caesar stops them.

Well, "stops" them until
Ben shoots Caesar in the chest
with a shotgun. Damn!

Ben and Locke arrive
on the main island, where Sun
and Frank are waiting.

Sun shows Ben the pic
of the Dharma crew with Jack,
Hurley, Kate in it.

Ben seems surprised by
this, but then, he's a master
liar, so who knows.

When he asks what Frank
and Sun are doing there, they
"Waiting for Godot John Locke"

Frank has had enough
craziness for one lifetime,
says he's going back.

Sun says, "I got to
try and find my husband, so
I'll stay with these guys."

Locke tells Sun, "I have
some ideas on how to find
Jin again, but first...

...Ben has to summon
our pal Smokey." Ben pulls a
plug on a drain. Huh?

When Smokey doesn't
show up, Locke says, "Follow me."
and heads jungle-bound.

They get outside the
Temple. Locke tells Ben, "Under
there you'll find Smokey."

Ben tells Sun, "If you
see Desmond, tell him 'Sorry',
he'll know what I mean."

And we know - sort of -
because we flash back to when
Ben confronted Des.

Ben shoots Desmond's bag
of groceries, spilling his
milk! No use crying!

He then is planning
on killing Penny, but stops
when he sees her kid.

Desmond then beats the
crap out of Ben and throws him
into the water.

Other flashback stuff:
Widmore gets pissed that Ben saved
Alex, claims it's fate.

Later, Charles is
banished from the Island 'cause
he had his own child.

On the small island,
Frank comes back to find a coup
Ilana asks him...

...this question, "What lies
in the shadow of statue?"
(Is the answer 'Ben'?)

When Frank doesn't know,
Ilana smacks him in the
head with a gun. Ouch!

In the Temple (of
Doom?), Ben is surrounded by
Smokey in Judge Mode.

After showing Ben
the Alex Greatest Hits, the
monster goes back home.

An Alex vision
appears before Ben, commands
him, "Do. What. Locke. Says."

Ben swears he will, and
that appeases SmokeAlex.
It leaves Ben alive.

Seems there's been a shift
in power from Ben to Locke
in who knows the most.

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Haiku Review: Bolt

Superhero dog,
declawed cat, and a hamster
make a funny team.

Predictable? Sure.
But, dude, it's Disney. Plus, it
made me laugh a lot.

Wednesday, April 08, 2009

They had similiar discussions a thousand years ago

So. Next year - is it "two thousand ten" or "twenty ten"?
We've got about 260-ish days to figure it out. Discuss.

Sunday, April 05, 2009

Haiku Review: Lost - Whatever Happened, Happened

Not a lot of plot
here, but plenty to discuss.
Let's break it down, yo.

Ben spends most of this
episode in pain from the
bullet in his chest.

It's not a question
of if he'll live, but the how
is what we don't know.

Juliet does her
best to save the young kid's life
but she's no surgeon.

Hey, good thing that there
is a doctor in the camp!
But Jack says "uh-uh."

Wait.... WHAT? Jack doesn't
want to fix something?!? Are we
sure that's really Jack?

Hey Jack, remember
that oath you took that you would,
you know, do no harm?

Well...I guess you could
argue you haven't taken
that oath yet, but still.

Since Jack doesn't want
to save a young kid's life, Kate
will have to step in.

Kate, along with James,
take Ben to the Others and
say, "Fix him up, guys!"

Richard Alpert warns
"This will wipe his memory,"
and I roll my eyes.

But at least we have
an answer (however bad)
to Hurley's question:

"If this all took place
already why doesn't grown Ben
remember Sayid?"

Speaking of Hurley
his conversation with Miles
was hilarious.

If you're still confused
about the whole time travel
issue(s), this may help:

Scroll down and read the
bit about cookie crumbs and
Central Avenue


Other important
events from this ep: Kate came
back to rescue Claire.

Seems that raising a
kid who belongs to someone
else ate at Kate's soul.

Also - Kate told the
truth (all of it?) about the
Island to James' ex.

AND she told Claire's mum
at least some of the truth, too.
Kate. Here. Look this up.

Do you remember
Rose and Bernard and Vincent?
The writers sure don't!

In the future/now,
Ben wakes up and sees John Locke
next week's gonna rock!

Friday, April 03, 2009

Haiku Review: Resident Evil

How does a movie
with zombies, guns, and zombie
dogs wind up so meh?

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

March's word cloud is here.

There was a Stephen King category on Jeopardy! today, and I got every response correct. So, that was nice and ego-boosting.

I've gone back to the haiku review entries made on the last day of '08, and separated them all into individual posts (rather than grouped in bunches of 20). I'll also restart posting haiku reviews of movies I see from here on out.

Not a lot else to say right now. All of Spish is currently in varying degrees of unhealthiness, which sucks.

...that's about all for now, I guess.