Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Haiku Review: Lost - The Incident, Part 2

Locke and the Others
get to the statue's foot, which
is where Jacob lives.

FlashJack! During a
surgery, Jack screws up, starts
to panic. But then...

...Christian tells his son,
"Calm down. Count to five. Drink up."
(Well, not that last one.)

But he does tell Jack
"If you can't do this, I will.
So man the eff up."

Jack does, then goes to
the vending machine to get
an Apollo bar.

But this just ain't Jack's
day. The candy bar get struck.
Frustrated, Jack leaves.

He finds Christian in
the hallway and says, "Hey dad,
why'd you call me out?"

"Silly Jack," replies
Christian. "You are your own worst
enemy. See ya!"

As he leaves, Jacob
shows up with two candy bars.
He hands one to Jack.

As he touches Jack,
he says, "It just needed a
push." Subtle, writers!

Back on the Island,
Sawyer has asked to talk with
Jack for five minutes.

Jack: "Well, Sayid is
mortally wounded back here.
But.... okay. Let's chat."

Sawyer says, "Look, Jack,
my parents died when I was
eight. ...which was last year.

"I could have changed the
past." "Why didn't you?" asks Jack.
"What happened, happened."

"No, no, no," says Jack.
"Just nuke the energy thing,
and BLAM! Past is changed!"

"Jesus, doc. What's so
bad in the future that you
need to blow it up?"

"Would you believe... it's
because Kate and I are no
longer together?"

Really, show? Really?!?!
Sawyer can't seem to believe
it either, and so...

...because they're both male,
and stubborn, they resort to
punching each other.

James is winning the
brawl (he kicked Jack in the balls!!),
but then Juliet...

...says, "Jack is right." Um.
Is this brain damage disease
infecting them all??

Juliet's flashback
is brief, and Jacob-less. Strange.
It's when her folks split.

In the "present", she
tells James she is okay with
blowing up the past...

...because if she and
Sawyer never meet, then she
won't have to lose him.

Because she has seen
the way he's looked at "Freckles"
Aw. Poor Juliet.

At the Swan site, the
Dharma crew is drilling, and
of course, getting guns.

Jack, Kate reminisce
about first time they met, which
is in 30 years.

They discuss Aaron,
and setting things right for him.
Kate is now on board.

Which is good, because
the Incident is going
to happen quite soon.

Flashback for Hurley!
He gets released from jail and
gets in a cab with...

...Jacob! But, of course!
He tells Hurley what flight to
be on to go back.

But he tells Hurley
it's his choice if he wants to
go back or not. Hmmm.

He leaves a guitar
case with Hugo, saying that,
"It's not my guitar."

At Swan site, Sayid
has the bomb ready to go.
He gives it to Jack.

Jack says this will save
him, to which Sayid responds,
"Nothing can save me."

At the statue, Locke
and Ben follow Richard in
a secret passage.

Once Richard opens
a hidden door, he returns
to the beach alone.

Locke hands Ben a large
knife. Ben looks petrified for
the first time ever.

In the '70's,
at the Swan construction site,
Miles sees fit to ask...

..."what if dropping the
bomb is what causes what you're
trying to prevent?"

This is met with a
bunch of blank stares. "So glad you've
thought this plan through, guys."

But it's too late to
turn back now, since: the gang is
shooting at hippies...

...hippies are shooting
at the gang. They get to the
spot where they're drilling.

Jack drops the bomb core
into the deep, dark hole and
we all hold our breath.

Moments pass. Jack's brain
is currently channeling
Marvin the Martian:

"Where is the ka-boom?
There's supposed to be an earth-
shattering ka-boom!"

Soon, though, something starts
to happen. There's a rumbling
from deep in the hole.

All things metallic
at the construction site start
flying to the hole.

Dr. Chang's hand gets
crushed by some equipment. Miles
goes to help his dad.

A crane falls over
and Phil, one of the Dharma
jerks, gets impaled. Yay!

Jack, who often is
a tool, gets hit in the head
with a toolbox. HA!!

Ha ha ha!!! Sorry.
I shouldn't laugh, but, my god
it was funny. Look!

No more laughing now.
Juliet is in danger!
She's wrapped up in chains...

...that begin to drag
her down toward the hole. James
grabs her arms and pulls.

James is yelling, "Don't
let go!" Juliet says she
loves him, can't hold on.

Helplessly, Sawyer
watches Juliet fall to
her untimely death.

The show goes to a
commercial break, and I have
something in my eye.

Ilana shows up
at the base of the statue.
She asks for Richard.

Well, she really asks
for "Ricardus", which goes to
show how old he is.

She asks, "What lies in
the shadow of the statue?"
and Richard answers... Latin. Thank god
we have the internet to
translate these things, yes?

The answer Richard
gave was, "He who will protect
(or save) us all." Hmmm.

Satisfied with this
response, Ilana opens
the box, revealing...

...a still very dead
John Locke. Which means the Locke in
the statue... uh-oh.

Inside the statue,
Jacob greets "Locke" by saying,
"You found your loophole."

"Locke" confirms this, adds,
"You have no idea what I've
gone through to be here."

Ben asks if Locke and
Jacob have met before. "Locke"
tells Ben that they have.

He then urges Ben
to do what he was asked to.
"Ben, you have a choice"... says Jacob. Ben
asks, "What choice?" Jacob says, "You
can do what he asked...

...or you can just go."
But Ben is pretty peeved that
Jacob has ignored...

...him for so many years
after his devotion, yet
he'll see John, no prob.

Ben whines, "What about
me? It isn't fair! I've had
enough, want my share!"

Then Jacob says the
worst thing he possibly could:
"What about you?" Ben...

...stabs Jacob two times.
With his dying breath, Jacob
warns "Locke": "They're coming."

"Locke" looks upset at
this, then kicks Jacob's body
into the fire pit.

The Swan site has built
up a lot of energy
and is gonna blow.

So those still alive
start to run from the site as
fast as they can, but... the bottom of
the hole, Juliet, wounded,
but alive, wakes up.

Lying beside her
is Jughead's core and a rock.
She picks up the rock...

...and bangs it against
the bomb's core, crying as she
does. It takes eight hits...

...before there's a flash
of white, ending the show 'til
winter of next year.

So the show ended
with a bang - literally.
What did you all think?

Your theories, questions,
speculation, wish lists and
feedback are welcome.

1 comment:

Amy said...

Because I am a nerd, I consulted my Latin dictionary instead of the internet. Which was good, because I thought "serva" was slave.