Bah. I had a huge tirade typed out, but it was rambly, stream-of-conciesness crap, so I'll retype it in list form. Simpler.
Reasons I'm a bad friend:
I don't keep in contact.
I don't know what to say to help friends in their times of trouble.
I give crap advice (or have none to offer, period).
I don't pay enough attention.
I am selfish, self-centered, and constantly thinking of myself, rather than the other person. (this list is prime example. It's all "I", "I", "I".)
There are other things I could list, I'm sure, but they're merely variations of the things already stated. It's no wonder that I'm friendless in RL. What confuses me is that I've got people I consider friends online. Because, of course, the faults I have in real life carry over into online. I am constantly not emailing/PMing people back. And I get far too wrapped up in my own stuff and not enough into other people's. And then when folks need me - I don't know what to say or do. [heart] seems so...not enough. And while the feelings are there, it's oftentimes too difficult to convey across the media of text only.
Tomorrow is my cat's birthday. It's also Stephen King's. And Jupe's aunt. In addition, it is Jared's birthday. Jared is the friend I've known for the longest (over half my life), and I'm sure I won't call him. Mostly due to the fact that I've lost his phone number. Partly due to the fact that as a friend, I suck ass.
If, on the off-chance that he somehow finds this, I'll wish him a happy birthday, and a "How you like?" [grin] I'm sorry I suck as a friend, Jared.
And everyone.
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