I am so glad that after tomorrow, this fucking election will be done.
Whether the end result is positive or negative, at least it will be finished, and we can put it behind us.
And, now, I'll ask the 8-ball what's going to happen. I asked the 8-ball about the 2004 presidential election, and it was wrong (or was it??) so with that in mind, let's see what it has to say this go around:
8-ball, do you know the outcome of tomorrow's presidential election?
DON'T COUNT ON IT
Um. Okay. Do you have a guess as to the outcome?
BETTER NOT TELL YOU NOW
Oh, for the love of god. Look. 8-ball. I simply want to know, as do my readers, will Barack Obama be elected President of the United States tomorrow?
ASK AGAIN LATER
Wow. This totally isn't playing out the way I had hoped.
Maybe I need to be more vague to begin with.
Let's see... will the election occur tomorrow?
AS I SEE IT YES
Oh, we're starting to get somewhere.
Will Nevada go to Obama?
OUTLOOK NOT SO GOOD
Um. Really? What about Colorado, will that go to Obama?
IT IS CERTAIN
Well, that's a little better. Can we wrap this up - will Obama wind up becoming president?
WITHOUT A DOUBT
There ya go, guys. It took some coaxing, but the 8-ball has spoken. I'll see you all on Wednesday.
3 comments:
Phew! What a relief.
Oh man, if it's wrong, I'm flying to your house and smashing your 8-ball.
Your 8-ball is Large and In Charge. And it works.
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