The ending of the South Park episode "Scott Tenorman Must Die" had me laughing very hard today. In fact, rethinking about it makes me smile and chuckle. I don't want to give it away, but if you've seen it, you undoubtedly know what I'm talking about. (Chili.)
Two Simpsons things that have caused me to laugh:
A classic - "Hello. I'm Mr. Burns and I believe you have a letter for me."
"Okay, Mr. Burns, what's your first name?"
"I don't know."
It never gets old!
And the other Simpsons line - "We'd like to strike Mr. Skinner's testimony from the record!"
Heh.
And then there was the thing that I saw today at work. A female coworker, who has a reputation of sleeping around quite a bit had her cell phone with her. She asks me if I could read this text message she received and maybe give her some advice. I'm never a good one for advice giving, and especially when it comes to relationship material, but I want to be a good friend, and there might be something I can say, so I say I'll take a look at her phone.
She pulls up the text message on the phone and hands it to me. The screen reads:
OMG! I just found out
that one of the guys
you messed around with
has AIDS!! But
I read that and my eyebrows raised to the top of my head. Holy fuck, I'm thinking. I ask her, "How do I read more?", and she pushes a button to scroll down. The rest of the message reads:
Don't worry, because
I just saved a bunch
of money by switching
to Geico! Hee hee!
I laughed for nearly five minutes straight. The message was sent to her by her sister, who apparently has a reputation for pulling jokes like that. I think the humor comes from the utter sense of relief one feels when you realize that the scare isn't real. I'm sure that not everyone would find this joke funny, but the morbid side of me really was very amused. [shrug] People are weird.
Speaking of weird and crazy people, Dateline is doing a story on Mark David Chapman - the guy who shot John Lennon. It's spooky, crazy stuff. It just goes to show how ungodly crazy brains can be. Earlier, the Spanish Inquisition came up in our conversation at dinner, and it made me realize that people can be especially creative with ways to cause harm to others. I mean, drawn and quartered? What kind of sick mind comes up with something like that?
What was the eyerolly stuff? I totally had something to mention in that regard, but now I forget what it was. Oh well.
In other news, I've reached the 20000 mark. Woohoo!! STill not at the point where the shit hits the fan, but, hey, there's still plenty of days left in November...
In conclusion, my arm is totally asleep, and so is Irina.
Friday, November 18, 2005
Thursday, November 17, 2005
60 to go?
It would be apropos if the Lostaways ended up being there for 108 days total by the end of the series. We'll see, I suppose.
I can't believe that Thanksgiving is only 1 week away. It totally doesn't feel like it.
I'm at 19,052. Still far behind, but at least more stuff is happening now. I think I know where I'm going with the awesome scene that I thought of yesterday, which is good, since I'm AT that scene now.
Speaking of Nano, I updated (although it's now behind again) my word count at the official site, and I even put an excerpt (just a small paragraph) in my Nanowrimo profile. Yay.
The fact that Judd is still on this show just demonstrates the sadness of humans, I think. Man. (heee!)
Hey, maybe he'll get voted out tonight! [/said every week]
Short work week next week. Awesome.
My belly is all abaoiglny. I don't like it.
One Door Away From Heaven is getting pretty interesting, although, really, Curtis Hammond's story is the only one I really care about.
I have a slight headache.
I'm mostly just saying things to build up my word count. It's nothing really interesting. Sorry.
The Steph is probably going to take Saren out for a mom/daughter date and go see the new Harry Potter movie. Jealous! But, she said that she'd take me in a month or so, so word.
Time to hit "Publish Post"
I can't believe that Thanksgiving is only 1 week away. It totally doesn't feel like it.
I'm at 19,052. Still far behind, but at least more stuff is happening now. I think I know where I'm going with the awesome scene that I thought of yesterday, which is good, since I'm AT that scene now.
Speaking of Nano, I updated (although it's now behind again) my word count at the official site, and I even put an excerpt (just a small paragraph) in my Nanowrimo profile. Yay.
The fact that Judd is still on this show just demonstrates the sadness of humans, I think. Man. (heee!)
Hey, maybe he'll get voted out tonight! [/said every week]
Short work week next week. Awesome.
My belly is all abaoiglny. I don't like it.
One Door Away From Heaven is getting pretty interesting, although, really, Curtis Hammond's story is the only one I really care about.
I have a slight headache.
I'm mostly just saying things to build up my word count. It's nothing really interesting. Sorry.
The Steph is probably going to take Saren out for a mom/daughter date and go see the new Harry Potter movie. Jealous! But, she said that she'd take me in a month or so, so word.
Time to hit "Publish Post"
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
bloggin'
on a wednesday night with a baby in my arms and with nothin' to say.
haven't we done this tune already?
I'm at 18.020 (or 18,020, rather). And! I'm out of the flashback and back in the present. Woo hoo! Even better, i've got an upcoming scene thgat ius very... good. Except that i don't know how it's going to play out, because my brain can't conceive it to the logical conclusion, which sucks. ame old brain.
In other news, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire opens in two days. Thias is the first Harry Piotter movie that the station has not had a prescreening for. [frown]
i guess that's all.
haven't we done this tune already?
I'm at 18.020 (or 18,020, rather). And! I'm out of the flashback and back in the present. Woo hoo! Even better, i've got an upcoming scene thgat ius very... good. Except that i don't know how it's going to play out, because my brain can't conceive it to the logical conclusion, which sucks. ame old brain.
In other news, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire opens in two days. Thias is the first Harry Piotter movie that the station has not had a prescreening for. [frown]
i guess that's all.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Another long blog entry. One of those ones where I write periodically
throughout the day, adding to it as I think of things. And I should be
working on my story. Which I will be. Right now I'm at 16,029.
First things first.
It's time for one of my favorite segments in the P@rix (and hopefully
one of yours as well) - Viewer Message Time!!
I'll transcribe another message that was left on my voice mail. Yay!
This one is from an older (sounding) gentleman - sounds about 60ish.
Also, his last name and phone number will be omitted. And here we go:
Yes, Mister Patrick [my last name], this is Art [his last name] [and
then he spells it!!]. Phone numbers: [he gives me two phone numbers to
reach him at]. Uh. My question is, why was the 7th Heaven show canceled?
It's one of the best shows you've got on TV. And my next question is, is
when is Jerry Springer gonna either get off the air or put on some new
shows? The ones he's got now is boring. And... you could put something
better on then Jerry Springer. And... what... the the problem is... you
might give it some thought is if there was more shows on like 7th
Heaven, and less shows on with, uh like detective stories and blood and
guts, and all this other crap that's on, uh, there might be less crime
in the United States. And put on more of these family shows like 7th
Heaven, and whether the ratings are bad or not, if you get enough of 'em
on there, they'll either have to watch 'em, or...or put a movie in their
set, one or the other. But at least give some uh clean, healthy type
entertainment for the people to watch instead of all this garbage. So.
That might be a thought that you might put to some of these lunatics
that dream up these stupid shows. So I'd appreciate a call from ya.
Thank you very much and have a nice day.
Money. Fucking. Sucks. Period.
thuwhu. keelsh and tooshj.
Yeah.
Okay, back to my story. Oh. But first: The otehr day when I was talking
about coincidences, Simon left the comment saying "Coincidence? I think
not." which was totally a great pop culture catchphrase for a while.
(where did that originate anyway? From those Time-Life Mysteries of the
Universe commercials? That's what my memory is telling me, but I can't
be sure.)
Anyway, what I want it replaced with is "Coincidence? I think so!"
Because EVERYTHING is a coincidence.
And the great thing about everything being a coincidence is that you can
be either awestruck OR dismissive, depending on how you feel about the
situation.
Example:
"Whoa. That's an amazing coincidence! How weird, man." <---Awestruck.
"Pfft. That's just a coincidence." < ---Dismissive.
Yay!
Now, coincidentally, I'm going to go back to work on my novel. Or back
to work on my work. One of the two.
16222. And it's lunch time. I'm not making nearly as much progress as I
had hoped, but what are you gonna do, starve? Heh.
Ruck Fules. Heeee! Some dork in the audience of the Maury Povich show
had that on his shirt. Oddly, the syndicators blurred it twice, but left
it alone the other five times he was visible. Man, censorship is not
only annoying, it's also pretty damn stupid. I mean, at least be
consistent if you're going to limit people's freedoms.
Speaking of enforced rules that blow (okay, I wasn't, technically, but I
didn't have a better segway ...or is it segue?), I must now go check on
some of our movies to ensure that they are closed captioned. Because,
see, starting in 2006 - which is just forty six days away - the FCC has
mandated that everything, with some exceptions (because there are always
exceptions ...except when there aren't), everything must be closed
captioned.
And that means that any movies we have in our movie library that are NOT
captioned (which, ironically, looks like it might be about 53%) can no
longer run. Thanks a ton, FCC!
And, actually, the above statement is not entirely true. The movies CAN
run if they are lacking captioning. It is just that if the FCC were to
find out about it, our station would most likely be fined as a result.
So, as always, it comes down to money.
Can someone please shoot this culture in the head?
The wind is freaking cold. What is up with that? Did I get transported
to the arctic and not know it? Brr, man. Brr.
The fact that i keep wanting to revise my story as I go is irritating. I
should just be focusing on writing. Foing goward. Or going forward, if
you prefer to be spoonerism free (aka foonerism spree). But, yeah. There
will be plenty of time for revision later. And eesh, is it going to need
it. Partr (part, rather) of me wants to just publish it on my blog
anyway, and screw the idea of trying to get it published as a book (or a
movie) because, really. Really. Plus. Word count! But, honestly. Is it
going to get published? Well, most likely, no. I don't know. It needs a
lot of work. In fact, I should work on it now.
Word count tally: Story = 16,531.
This blog entry (excluding the words: "Word count tally: Story = 16,531.
This blog entry (excluding the words: "Word count tally: Story =
16,531") = 916.
Nine sixteen? Bah!
Also. Sixteen five thirty one? Double bah! I need at least 1,018 words
in this blog entry. And at least 9 times that many in my story. Not
good. It's already 3pm. No time! I hate it.
It's much later in the day now. I didn't hit the halfway mark, and I got an inspirational email from the Nanowrimo folks about how Week Three (which we're now in) is supposed to be where things start to flow and come together and I'm totally not that way with my story, but thanks for thinking of me anyway, guys.
And there was a big ta-doo today and it's been an extremely long day and I love Stephanie so freaking much and even though SHE doesn't agree, she totally is a superhero.
throughout the day, adding to it as I think of things. And I should be
working on my story. Which I will be. Right now I'm at 16,029.
First things first.
It's time for one of my favorite segments in the P@rix (and hopefully
one of yours as well) - Viewer Message Time!!
I'll transcribe another message that was left on my voice mail. Yay!
This one is from an older (sounding) gentleman - sounds about 60ish.
Also, his last name and phone number will be omitted. And here we go:
Yes, Mister Patrick [my last name], this is Art [his last name] [and
then he spells it!!]. Phone numbers: [he gives me two phone numbers to
reach him at]. Uh. My question is, why was the 7th Heaven show canceled?
It's one of the best shows you've got on TV. And my next question is, is
when is Jerry Springer gonna either get off the air or put on some new
shows? The ones he's got now is boring. And... you could put something
better on then Jerry Springer. And... what... the the problem is... you
might give it some thought is if there was more shows on like 7th
Heaven, and less shows on with, uh like detective stories and blood and
guts, and all this other crap that's on, uh, there might be less crime
in the United States. And put on more of these family shows like 7th
Heaven, and whether the ratings are bad or not, if you get enough of 'em
on there, they'll either have to watch 'em, or...or put a movie in their
set, one or the other. But at least give some uh clean, healthy type
entertainment for the people to watch instead of all this garbage. So.
That might be a thought that you might put to some of these lunatics
that dream up these stupid shows. So I'd appreciate a call from ya.
Thank you very much and have a nice day.
Money. Fucking. Sucks. Period.
thuwhu. keelsh and tooshj.
Yeah.
Okay, back to my story. Oh. But first: The otehr day when I was talking
about coincidences, Simon left the comment saying "Coincidence? I think
not." which was totally a great pop culture catchphrase for a while.
(where did that originate anyway? From those Time-Life Mysteries of the
Universe commercials? That's what my memory is telling me, but I can't
be sure.)
Anyway, what I want it replaced with is "Coincidence? I think so!"
Because EVERYTHING is a coincidence.
And the great thing about everything being a coincidence is that you can
be either awestruck OR dismissive, depending on how you feel about the
situation.
Example:
"Whoa. That's an amazing coincidence! How weird, man." <---Awestruck.
"Pfft. That's just a coincidence." < ---Dismissive.
Yay!
Now, coincidentally, I'm going to go back to work on my novel. Or back
to work on my work. One of the two.
16222. And it's lunch time. I'm not making nearly as much progress as I
had hoped, but what are you gonna do, starve? Heh.
Ruck Fules. Heeee! Some dork in the audience of the Maury Povich show
had that on his shirt. Oddly, the syndicators blurred it twice, but left
it alone the other five times he was visible. Man, censorship is not
only annoying, it's also pretty damn stupid. I mean, at least be
consistent if you're going to limit people's freedoms.
Speaking of enforced rules that blow (okay, I wasn't, technically, but I
didn't have a better segway ...or is it segue?), I must now go check on
some of our movies to ensure that they are closed captioned. Because,
see, starting in 2006 - which is just forty six days away - the FCC has
mandated that everything, with some exceptions (because there are always
exceptions ...except when there aren't), everything must be closed
captioned.
And that means that any movies we have in our movie library that are NOT
captioned (which, ironically, looks like it might be about 53%) can no
longer run. Thanks a ton, FCC!
And, actually, the above statement is not entirely true. The movies CAN
run if they are lacking captioning. It is just that if the FCC were to
find out about it, our station would most likely be fined as a result.
So, as always, it comes down to money.
Can someone please shoot this culture in the head?
The wind is freaking cold. What is up with that? Did I get transported
to the arctic and not know it? Brr, man. Brr.
The fact that i keep wanting to revise my story as I go is irritating. I
should just be focusing on writing. Foing goward. Or going forward, if
you prefer to be spoonerism free (aka foonerism spree). But, yeah. There
will be plenty of time for revision later. And eesh, is it going to need
it. Partr (part, rather) of me wants to just publish it on my blog
anyway, and screw the idea of trying to get it published as a book (or a
movie) because, really. Really. Plus. Word count! But, honestly. Is it
going to get published? Well, most likely, no. I don't know. It needs a
lot of work. In fact, I should work on it now.
Word count tally: Story = 16,531.
This blog entry (excluding the words: "Word count tally: Story = 16,531.
This blog entry (excluding the words: "Word count tally: Story =
16,531") = 916.
Nine sixteen? Bah!
Also. Sixteen five thirty one? Double bah! I need at least 1,018 words
in this blog entry. And at least 9 times that many in my story. Not
good. It's already 3pm. No time! I hate it.
It's much later in the day now. I didn't hit the halfway mark, and I got an inspirational email from the Nanowrimo folks about how Week Three (which we're now in) is supposed to be where things start to flow and come together and I'm totally not that way with my story, but thanks for thinking of me anyway, guys.
And there was a big ta-doo today and it's been an extremely long day and I love Stephanie so freaking much and even though SHE doesn't agree, she totally is a superhero.
Monday, November 14, 2005
15,something
I've got a sleeping (barely) baby in mmy arms, and not a lot to say, so this will be a short entry.
Um, like, that short, apparently. I really have noyhing to blog about right now. On the upside, I've got a gabillion new ideas for the story. (slthough still no real clear ending. Not that I'm anywehere near the ending yet. Man, when Jen has a flashback, she really has a flashback.) So /I guess it balances out, huh? The real question is - can i write 10 thosand words in the story by tomorrow?
Yes. Yes, I can.
Will I?
Find out tomorrow. Same P@ time, same P@ blog...el. Hee. blogel.
Um, like, that short, apparently. I really have noyhing to blog about right now. On the upside, I've got a gabillion new ideas for the story. (slthough still no real clear ending. Not that I'm anywehere near the ending yet. Man, when Jen has a flashback, she really has a flashback.) So /I guess it balances out, huh? The real question is - can i write 10 thosand words in the story by tomorrow?
Yes. Yes, I can.
Will I?
Find out tomorrow. Same P@ time, same P@ blog...el. Hee. blogel.
Sunday, November 13, 2005
14,388
That's where i am at in my word count for the story. also, i'm totally used to typing in microsoft word and having my errors either be autocorrected or underlined. blgger should do that. Oh well. Guess I'll just have to be more diligent.
Dude. Everything is a coincidence. Truly. (some) People say that there is no such thing as coincidences, but they have it completely wrong. EVERYTHING is. Life. The fact that you are reading this. The fact that I am typing it (or, rather, was typing it. Heh. Reading is like time travel. Time is meaningless!). Just... everything.
It's a difficult concept to accept, but I'm trying to.
Here's an example. In my story - roads play a major role. Highways in particular. Perth, Australia also plays a big role. I went to wikipedia and typed in "highways", and at first I got the entry that someone had changed where all it said was "balls". (Very mature!), so I clicked on the history button and went to the last change and got the real article. The picture they had was of the Mitchell Freeway in Perth, Western Australia.
Everything is a coincidence.
In other news, um. I don't think i had any other news, actually. I hsould (should, even) get back to my sotry (or story, if you prefer). I'm almost out of the flashback (dude, if my story were a tv show, it would be Lost, because it's totally a flashback like Lost would do. But the bad thing is, since it has been such a slow week for me, the flashback has been all i've been writing for the past...forever.)
ANyway, the point is that this version is going to need MAJOR revision. S. Revisions. Yeah.
But on the upside, at least I'm getting stuff out there. I doubt highly that I'll get it revised completely by the date that it's supposed to be taking place (June 6th, 2006) but no big. I'll just be happy if i get it written, period.
In conclusion, I need to shave. My face is all itchy.
Dude. Everything is a coincidence. Truly. (some) People say that there is no such thing as coincidences, but they have it completely wrong. EVERYTHING is. Life. The fact that you are reading this. The fact that I am typing it (or, rather, was typing it. Heh. Reading is like time travel. Time is meaningless!). Just... everything.
It's a difficult concept to accept, but I'm trying to.
Here's an example. In my story - roads play a major role. Highways in particular. Perth, Australia also plays a big role. I went to wikipedia and typed in "highways", and at first I got the entry that someone had changed where all it said was "balls". (Very mature!), so I clicked on the history button and went to the last change and got the real article. The picture they had was of the Mitchell Freeway in Perth, Western Australia.
Everything is a coincidence.
In other news, um. I don't think i had any other news, actually. I hsould (should, even) get back to my sotry (or story, if you prefer). I'm almost out of the flashback (dude, if my story were a tv show, it would be Lost, because it's totally a flashback like Lost would do. But the bad thing is, since it has been such a slow week for me, the flashback has been all i've been writing for the past...forever.)
ANyway, the point is that this version is going to need MAJOR revision. S. Revisions. Yeah.
But on the upside, at least I'm getting stuff out there. I doubt highly that I'll get it revised completely by the date that it's supposed to be taking place (June 6th, 2006) but no big. I'll just be happy if i get it written, period.
In conclusion, I need to shave. My face is all itchy.
Saturday, November 12, 2005
How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?
Let's find out.
Blogger posts I have made in the P@rix: 930. (New goal! If I play my cards right, i'd like to reach 1000 by the end of the year. Totally doable!!)
Word count on my novel: 13262
Word count on Saren's novel: 140
Word count on my blog: 105219
Now let's see that info as meters...
Blog posts:
My Novel:
Saren's novel:
Year-to-date blog total:
Blogger posts I have made in the P@rix: 930. (New goal! If I play my cards right, i'd like to reach 1000 by the end of the year. Totally doable!!)
Word count on my novel: 13262
Word count on Saren's novel: 140
Word count on my blog: 105219
Now let's see that info as meters...
Blog posts:
| |
930 / 1,000 (93.0%) |
My Novel:
| |
13,262 / 50,000 (26.5%) |
Saren's novel:
| |
140 / 500 (28.0%) |
Year-to-date blog total:
| |
105,219 / 200,005 (52.6%) |
Friday, November 11, 2005
V is for Vonnegut
Or, it should be.
Today, besides being Veteran's Day (I won't voice my unpopular opinion that it's kinda weird to celebrate war and the people who fight in them. Oh. Wait. Oops.) is also the birthday of Kurt Vonnegut, Jr, writer, satirist, and all around... human. Yay.
Today also was Friday, which means the week of hell at work has finally concluded. Yay, I guess. I have not done any writing on my story at all today. That's the second or third day this month that I've done that. I'm currently at 13,092, and it really is crap. Well, no, that's harsh. It needs a lot of revising. Yeah.
Um.
Speaking of work, I am getting an ulcer. Got to love the American Dream, no?
[ish] HEE! I meant to type [sigh], but found the typo too funny to correct.
So, yeah. I gues...OH!! I totally forgot the Big News of the Day!
7th Heaven is going off the air after this season!!
That's right, it was announced today that the "drama" (note the irony quote marks there) 7th Heaven, which is currently in its mind boggling tenth season (I KNOW!!!) will be calling it quits at the end of this season.
The "show", which was the WB's first foray into hour long dramas back in 1996, has been the WB's highest rated series, and has been airing in the same time period (Monday nights at 8pm) since day one. (That itself is incredible and pretty much unheard of in programming.)
No word yet on how it's gonna wrap up, but I'm holding out for a bloodbath where one (or all) of the Camden kids finally snaps, killing everyone in the city.
Weird. 7th Heaven is ending. So it goes.
In conclusion, You know everything I say is horseshit.
Today, besides being Veteran's Day (I won't voice my unpopular opinion that it's kinda weird to celebrate war and the people who fight in them. Oh. Wait. Oops.) is also the birthday of Kurt Vonnegut, Jr, writer, satirist, and all around... human. Yay.
Today also was Friday, which means the week of hell at work has finally concluded. Yay, I guess. I have not done any writing on my story at all today. That's the second or third day this month that I've done that. I'm currently at 13,092, and it really is crap. Well, no, that's harsh. It needs a lot of revising. Yeah.
Um.
Speaking of work, I am getting an ulcer. Got to love the American Dream, no?
[ish] HEE! I meant to type [sigh], but found the typo too funny to correct.
So, yeah. I gues...OH!! I totally forgot the Big News of the Day!
7th Heaven is going off the air after this season!!
That's right, it was announced today that the "drama" (note the irony quote marks there) 7th Heaven, which is currently in its mind boggling tenth season (I KNOW!!!) will be calling it quits at the end of this season.
The "show", which was the WB's first foray into hour long dramas back in 1996, has been the WB's highest rated series, and has been airing in the same time period (Monday nights at 8pm) since day one. (That itself is incredible and pretty much unheard of in programming.)
No word yet on how it's gonna wrap up, but I'm holding out for a bloodbath where one (or all) of the Camden kids finally snaps, killing everyone in the city.
Weird. 7th Heaven is ending. So it goes.
In conclusion, You know everything I say is horseshit.
Thursday, November 10, 2005
Koontz List
So. I made the goal a while back to read all of Dean "Go Word Count!" Koontz's novels, even those that suck. And even those that were written under a different name (and the guy has used several. Split personality much?). I've read several of them before, so I won't have to reread those, which is good, because life is short.
Thanks to wikipedia, I've got a list of all of his novels - along with the years that they were prublished. Or published, even.
I'll embolden (heh) the ones I've read (that I can remember reading. Some I may have read and just don't recall. Stupid generic exchangeable titles.[/mutter]) and then after the list, I'll put any little comments about the books I've read. Go word count!
#7 - Life Expectancy another decent book. The humor actually worked in this one, and I enjoyed the villain(s). Although I gotta wonder, if someone predicted that your newborn child would have five dates of misery and strife (and told you exactly what dates they would be) ...would you tell your child? Yeah, there's the idea of being prepared for something bad that is going to come, but on the other hand, maybe not knowing at all would be better. I Don't know. Just seemed odd that Jimmy Tock's parents would tell him about his dates with destiny at all. Of course, if they hadn't we wouldn't have the story...or maybe we'd have a very different one. [shrug]
#8 - The Taking - This one started out pretty good. Very quick, very actiony, very apocalypse. About 60 or 70% through the book I said to Steph, "I just don't see how he's going to get them out of it." because the situation was just so freaking dire. And then the ending came and it sucked ass. Plus, there was a "super dog" in this one (Dean Koontz has a tendency to include dogs that exhibit greater intelligence, kindness, and humanity than any normal person you'd meet in the world). If Dean Koontz (or someone) were to rewrite this book with a MUCH different ending, it would be top notch.
#13 - One Door Away From Heaven - currently reading. There are three narratives going on in this story, and I am most intrigued by the one about the boy on the run. Even if he does have a dog with him. I'm barely 100 pages in, so the verdict is still out right now.
#15 - False Memory - UGH! Horrid. He's used the same plot in at least two of his books, plus there was a super dog. And a completely unneccesary disturbing sex/incest scene. This type of crap is what gives Koontz a bad name.
#18 - Sole Survivor - Um. I read it, but don't have much memory of it. Something about people surviving plane crashes? The ending, if I recall, was totally unexpected... but I don't know if that was a good thing or not.
#21- Intensity - I hated this book, even though it is supposedly one of his best. I don't recall much about it, except that the villain was laughably stupid. (Not that the villain was unintelligent, just unbelievable as a person.) And the protagonist was much the same.
#22 - Dark Rivers of the Heart - I know I liked this one, but I can't recall for the life of me what it was about. Doh.
#24 - Dragon Tears - This was one of my favorite Koontz books, and I know I recommended it to the Steph, but she hated it. This had a super dog in it, but I didn't care. I liked the story of a person becoming a god. The scene where time was frozen except for the two cops was awesome.
#35 - The Servants of Twilight - Another really great story that fell apart at the end. I came up with a much better ending, but meh.
#38 - Watchers - The book that got Koontz noticed. And that features a super dog as the main plot point. Not a bad story, but I have no idea what happened in it. I've not watched any of the movies based on this, and have no desire to.
#39 - Strangers - This was Koontz's The Stand. Totally epic, covering multiple characters from all walks of life who slowly come to realize that even though they don't know each other - at first - that they have something really big in common. No idea how it ended, though. Heh.
#44 - Phantoms - Yay for the premise! Boo to the fact that I can't remember a single thing about the story!
#54 - Night Chills - Er. I know it was about a government group using subliminal messages to control people, and I know that it had some very explicit sex scenes. Other than that, I have no idea.
Huh. So, I guess in conclusion what I've learned is that most of Dean Koontz's books suck at the end, and/or are completely forgettable. Yay!
Thanks to wikipedia, I've got a list of all of his novels - along with the years that they were prublished. Or published, even.
I'll embolden (heh) the ones I've read (that I can remember reading. Some I may have read and just don't recall. Stupid generic exchangeable titles.[/mutter]) and then after the list, I'll put any little comments about the books I've read. Go word count!
- Dean Koontz's Frankenstien, Book Three (Summer 2006)
- The Husband (May 30, 2006)
- Forever Odd (November 29, 2005)
- Dean Koontz's Frankenstein, Book Two: City of Night w/ Ed Gorman (July 26, 2005)
- Velocity (May 24, 2005)
- Dean Koontz's Frankenstein, Book One: Prodigal Son w/ Kevin J. Anderson (January 25, 2005)
- Life Expectancy (December 7, 2004)
- The Taking (May 25, 2004)
- Odd Thomas (December 9, 2003)
- The Face (May 27, 2003)
- The Book of Counted Sorrows (2003)
- By the Light of the Moon (December 24, 2002)
- One Door Away from Heaven (US December 26, 2001)
- From the Corner of His Eye (December 26, 2000)
- False Memory (December 28, 1999)
- Seize the Night (December 29, 1998)
- Fear Nothing (January 14, 1998)
- Sole Survivor (January 29, 1997)
- Demon Seed (revised edition) (July, 1997)
- Tick-Tock (October 1, 1996)
- Intensity (1996)
- Dark Rivers of the Heart (1994)
- The Door to December (1994)
- Dragon Tears (1993)
- Mr. Murder (1993)
- Trapped (1993, Graphic Novel)
- The Funhouse (1992)
- Hideaway (1992)
- Cold Fire (1991)
- The Bad Place (1990)
- Shadowfires (1990)
- The Eyes of Darkness (1989)
- Midnight (1989)
- Lightning (1988)
- The Servants of Twilight (1988, as Leigh Nichols)
- The Voice of the Night (1988)
- Shadowfires (1987, as Leigh Nichols)
- Watchers (1987)
- Strangers (1986)
- The Door to December (1985, as Richard Paige)
- Twilight Eyes (1985)
- Darkfall (1984)
- Twilight (1984, as Leigh Nichols)
- Phantoms (1983)
- The House of Thunder (1982, as Leigh Nichols)
- The Eyes of Darkness (1981, as Leigh Nichols)
- The Mask (1981, as Owen West)
- The Funhouse (1980, as Owen West)
- The Voice of Night (1980, as Brian Coffey)
- Whispers (1980)
- The Key to Midnight (1979, as Leigh Nichols)
- The Face of Fear (1977, as Brian Coffey)
- The Vision (1977)
- Night Chills (1976)
- Prison of Ice (1976, as David Axton), reissued as Icebound (1995)
- Dragonfly (1975, as K. R. Dwyer)
- Invasion (1975, as Aaron Wolfe), reissued as Winter Moon (1994)
- The Long Sleep (1975, as John Hill)
- Nightmare Journey (1975)
- Wall of Masks (1975, as Brian Coffey)
- After the Last Race (1974)
- Surrounded (1974, as Brian Coffey)
- Blood Risk (1973, as Brian Coffey)
- Dance with the Devil (1973, as Deanna Dwyer)
- Demon Seed (1973)
- Hanging On (1973)
- The Haunted Earth (1973)
- Shattered (1973, as K. R. Dwyer)
- A Werewolf Among Us (1973)
- Chase (1972, as K. R. Dwyer)
- Children of the Storm (1972, as Deanna Dwyer)
- The Dark of Summer (1972, as Deanna Dwyer)
- A Darkness in My Soul (1972)
- Demon Child (1972, as Deanna Dwyer)
- The Flesh in the Furnace (1972)
- Starblood (1972)
- Time Thieves (1972)
- Warlock! (1972)
- The Crimson Witch (1971)
- Legacy of Terror (1971, as Deanna Dwyer)
- Anti-Man (1970)
- Beastchild (1970)
- Dark of the Woods (1970)
- Dark Symphony (1970)
- Hell's Gate (1970)
- The Fall of the Dream Machine (1969)
- Fear That Man (1969)
- Star Quest (1968)
#7 - Life Expectancy another decent book. The humor actually worked in this one, and I enjoyed the villain(s). Although I gotta wonder, if someone predicted that your newborn child would have five dates of misery and strife (and told you exactly what dates they would be) ...would you tell your child? Yeah, there's the idea of being prepared for something bad that is going to come, but on the other hand, maybe not knowing at all would be better. I Don't know. Just seemed odd that Jimmy Tock's parents would tell him about his dates with destiny at all. Of course, if they hadn't we wouldn't have the story...or maybe we'd have a very different one. [shrug]
#8 - The Taking - This one started out pretty good. Very quick, very actiony, very apocalypse. About 60 or 70% through the book I said to Steph, "I just don't see how he's going to get them out of it." because the situation was just so freaking dire. And then the ending came and it sucked ass. Plus, there was a "super dog" in this one (Dean Koontz has a tendency to include dogs that exhibit greater intelligence, kindness, and humanity than any normal person you'd meet in the world). If Dean Koontz (or someone) were to rewrite this book with a MUCH different ending, it would be top notch.
#13 - One Door Away From Heaven - currently reading. There are three narratives going on in this story, and I am most intrigued by the one about the boy on the run. Even if he does have a dog with him. I'm barely 100 pages in, so the verdict is still out right now.
#15 - False Memory - UGH! Horrid. He's used the same plot in at least two of his books, plus there was a super dog. And a completely unneccesary disturbing sex/incest scene. This type of crap is what gives Koontz a bad name.
#18 - Sole Survivor - Um. I read it, but don't have much memory of it. Something about people surviving plane crashes? The ending, if I recall, was totally unexpected... but I don't know if that was a good thing or not.
#21- Intensity - I hated this book, even though it is supposedly one of his best. I don't recall much about it, except that the villain was laughably stupid. (Not that the villain was unintelligent, just unbelievable as a person.) And the protagonist was much the same.
#22 - Dark Rivers of the Heart - I know I liked this one, but I can't recall for the life of me what it was about. Doh.
#24 - Dragon Tears - This was one of my favorite Koontz books, and I know I recommended it to the Steph, but she hated it. This had a super dog in it, but I didn't care. I liked the story of a person becoming a god. The scene where time was frozen except for the two cops was awesome.
#35 - The Servants of Twilight - Another really great story that fell apart at the end. I came up with a much better ending, but meh.
#38 - Watchers - The book that got Koontz noticed. And that features a super dog as the main plot point. Not a bad story, but I have no idea what happened in it. I've not watched any of the movies based on this, and have no desire to.
#39 - Strangers - This was Koontz's The Stand. Totally epic, covering multiple characters from all walks of life who slowly come to realize that even though they don't know each other - at first - that they have something really big in common. No idea how it ended, though. Heh.
#44 - Phantoms - Yay for the premise! Boo to the fact that I can't remember a single thing about the story!
#54 - Night Chills - Er. I know it was about a government group using subliminal messages to control people, and I know that it had some very explicit sex scenes. Other than that, I have no idea.
Huh. So, I guess in conclusion what I've learned is that most of Dean Koontz's books suck at the end, and/or are completely forgettable. Yay!
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Unwinding
I can't seem to unwind. I had one of the busiest days at work ever, and thus didn't get to do much work on my novel - I'm at 11,086 at last count. I want to (I mean, I WILL) reach 15000 tonight before going to sleep, so I've got some work ahead of me, but I'm all tense right now, and I don't know
a) why
and
b) what to do about it.
I hate when I get this way. Every little thing irritates me, and I have this anxious feeling that I need to be doing something, even though I don't want to DO anything. I really, really hate this feeling.
Additionally, my jaw left hurting. Or, put another, Non-Pearl Jam way, my jaw is currently aching from being tensed. Obviously this is due to stress, and I should relax, but again - I don't know how. Irk. Some.
Deep breath.
I was going to post a list of all the Dean Koontz novels he's ever written, along with my coments on them (go word count and all) because the Steph went and picked up another book of his (remember how I said I was going to read all of his novels? I'm still doing that.) but that doesn't really mesh with the semi-rant above, so I think I'll save it for another time.
In the meantime, I guess I'll sign off the computer ...no, I'll sign offline, and stay on the computer to work on my novel. At least until Lost comes on.
In conclusion, welcome to the new kind of tension.
a) why
and
b) what to do about it.
I hate when I get this way. Every little thing irritates me, and I have this anxious feeling that I need to be doing something, even though I don't want to DO anything. I really, really hate this feeling.
Additionally, my jaw left hurting. Or, put another, Non-Pearl Jam way, my jaw is currently aching from being tensed. Obviously this is due to stress, and I should relax, but again - I don't know how. Irk. Some.
Deep breath.
I was going to post a list of all the Dean Koontz novels he's ever written, along with my coments on them (go word count and all) because the Steph went and picked up another book of his (remember how I said I was going to read all of his novels? I'm still doing that.) but that doesn't really mesh with the semi-rant above, so I think I'll save it for another time.
In the meantime, I guess I'll sign off the computer ...no, I'll sign offline, and stay on the computer to work on my novel. At least until Lost comes on.
In conclusion, welcome to the new kind of tension.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Apocalypse When
So Sunday night CBS had a made for TV movie on (ahh, Sweeps) that was
entitled: Category 7: The End of the World, and was, fittingly enough,
about the end of the world. It had Randy (or Dennis, maybe?) Quaid -
which ever one of them was in Independence Day - and Shannen Doherty and
Gina Gershon and Tom Skerrit and lots of CGI of famous landmarks being
destroyed. I'm there! Count me in!
But because it started at 9pm and I'm an old man now, I taped it so I
could go to bed at a decent hour. (Plus, I knew that it wasn't going to
be very good, and I might want to fast forward or whatever) I opted to
watch it last night because Mondays have nothing good on television.
(Neither do Tuesdays, Fridays, or Saturdays, come to think of it.)
It was about what I expected. Although I was surprised at the amount of
characters and how much time they were given - I guess it helps for the
viewers to empathize with people we know stuff about. But then, at the
end of the two hours I'm smacked in the face with a stupid "To Be
Continued..."
The fuck kinda shit is that, CBS?!
So next Sunday is Part Two - and they didn't mentione (or mention, even)
if there was going to be a part 3, or if Part Two would wrap it up. I'm
torn on whether to watch it or not. I mean, I know it's gonna suck, but
there's still this part of me that wants to know how bad. Strange.
Although, really, I've got my own end of the world scenario going on
(broke the 10k mark today!! Woo!! But now I'm stuck!! Boo!!) to worry
about. So maybe I won't bother taping it after all. Meh. I've got a
week to decide, I guess.
In conclusion, I feel fine.
Monday, November 07, 2005
Treehouse of Horrors!!
Since the newest Simpsons Halloween special finally aired last night, I figured I'd list all the vignettes from all the episodes, highlighting my favorites (if I can remember, or if I can choose).
Woohoo!
Bad Dream House
Hungry are the Damned
The Raven
The Monkey's Paw
The Bart Zone
If I Only Had a Brain
Clown Without Pity
King Homer
Dial "Z" for Zombies (tie. Both vignettes are classics)
The Devil and Homer Simpson (Mmmm...forbidden donut)
Terror at 5 1/2 Feet
Bart Simpson's Dracula
The Shinning
Time and Punishment
Nightmare Cafeteria (this is, undoubtedly, the best Treehouse of Horror EVER.)
Attack of the 50-Foot Eyesores
Nightmare on Evergreen Terrace
Homer3
The Thing and I
The Genesis Tub
Citizen Kang (quite possibly my top pick of all time)
The Homega Man
Fly vs. Fly
Easy-Bake Coven
Hell Toupee
The Terror of Tiny Toon
Starship Poopers (Jerry Springer dying? Instant classic)
I Know What You Diddily-Iddily Did
Desperately Xeeking Xena
Life's a Glitch, Then You Die
G-G-Ghost D-D-Dad
Scary Tales Can Come True
Night of the Dolphin
Hex and the City
House of Whacks
Wiz Kids
Send in the Clones
The Fright to Creep and Scare
The Island of Dr. Hibbert
Reaper Madness
Frinkenstein
Stop the World, I Want to Goof Off
The Ned Zone
Four Beheadings and a Funeral
In the Belly of the Boss
B.I. Bartificial Intelligence
Survival of the Fattest
I've Grown A Costume to Your Face
In conclusion, Halloween and the Bimpsons. Two great tastes that taste great together.
Woohoo!
Bad Dream House
Hungry are the Damned
The Raven
The Monkey's Paw
The Bart Zone
If I Only Had a Brain
Clown Without Pity
King Homer
Dial "Z" for Zombies (tie. Both vignettes are classics)
The Devil and Homer Simpson (Mmmm...forbidden donut)
Terror at 5 1/2 Feet
Bart Simpson's Dracula
The Shinning
Time and Punishment
Nightmare Cafeteria (this is, undoubtedly, the best Treehouse of Horror EVER.)
Attack of the 50-Foot Eyesores
Nightmare on Evergreen Terrace
Homer3
The Thing and I
The Genesis Tub
Citizen Kang (quite possibly my top pick of all time)
The Homega Man
Fly vs. Fly
Easy-Bake Coven
Hell Toupee
The Terror of Tiny Toon
Starship Poopers (Jerry Springer dying? Instant classic)
I Know What You Diddily-Iddily Did
Desperately Xeeking Xena
Life's a Glitch, Then You Die
G-G-Ghost D-D-Dad
Scary Tales Can Come True
Night of the Dolphin
Hex and the City
House of Whacks
Wiz Kids
Send in the Clones
The Fright to Creep and Scare
The Island of Dr. Hibbert
Reaper Madness
Frinkenstein
Stop the World, I Want to Goof Off
The Ned Zone
Four Beheadings and a Funeral
In the Belly of the Boss
B.I. Bartificial Intelligence
Survival of the Fattest
I've Grown A Costume to Your Face
In conclusion, Halloween and the Bimpsons. Two great tastes that taste great together.
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Heavy!
Yesterday was the 50th anniversary of the date that Doc Brown fell, hit his head, and came up with the idea for the Flux Capacitor.
I should have written about it then, but forgot to. Perhaps if I had a DeLorean, and one point twenty one gigawatts of electricity, I could remedy that. (Let's ignore the fact that I can alter the time stamp on Blogger with a simple click of the mouse, shall we?)
query: If you enter a date that doesn't officially exist into the computer ( like Doc Brown does in the movie - December 25th, 0000 - there was no year 0 A.D., or the dates in ...I forget when, the 16hundreds? When the King just changed the calendar, making like two weeks of September completely disappear) what happens? Do you just end up going nowhere? Maybe we'll find out in Back to the Future 4. Or maybe I should search for some Back to the Future Fanfic. I'm sure it's out there.
In conclusion, Great Scott!
I should have written about it then, but forgot to. Perhaps if I had a DeLorean, and one point twenty one gigawatts of electricity, I could remedy that. (Let's ignore the fact that I can alter the time stamp on Blogger with a simple click of the mouse, shall we?)
query: If you enter a date that doesn't officially exist into the computer ( like Doc Brown does in the movie - December 25th, 0000 - there was no year 0 A.D., or the dates in ...I forget when, the 16hundreds? When the King just changed the calendar, making like two weeks of September completely disappear) what happens? Do you just end up going nowhere? Maybe we'll find out in Back to the Future 4. Or maybe I should search for some Back to the Future Fanfic. I'm sure it's out there.
In conclusion, Great Scott!
Saturday, November 05, 2005
Discouraging. Word. s.
I woke up this morning feeling very discouraged about my story, which is dumb, because it has been going pretty well. It's mostly due to the fact that I've got this ...sort of cognitive dissonance (or whatever). See, my characters have just done something that they totally would have done a LOT sooner in real life, and now I have to figure out why it took them so long to come up with that idea.
On the bright side, I think that I may have found a work around, but then, I haven't done any writing today at all, so I guess it's a moot point for now.
In conclusion, it's word count time...
On the bright side, I think that I may have found a work around, but then, I haven't done any writing today at all, so I guess it's a moot point for now.
In conclusion, it's word count time...
| |
100,872 / 200,005 (50.4%) |
Friday, November 04, 2005
cuh-rap.
So, I'm jamming along on my story, thinking it's going well, and getting to a pretty interesting part - the meat of this particular part of the story is really coming together when -plink!- the station's power went out.
Mmmm. Wasted time and words.
Oh well. It'll be interesting to see what comes of the rewrite, since I know I won't be able to exactly recreate the words I'd written previously.
In conclusion, Jesus Saves. So should I.
Mmmm. Wasted time and words.
Oh well. It'll be interesting to see what comes of the rewrite, since I know I won't be able to exactly recreate the words I'd written previously.
In conclusion, Jesus Saves. So should I.
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
What a character
It's been a LONG time since I've done real fiction writing, but now that
I'm back into the swing of things with my nano (sorta. Currently stuck
at 2258), I'm reminded of something that used to happen to me when I was
younger and more of a consistent writer. And reader.
I adopt characteristics of the main characters. I really get sucked into
whatever story I'm writing or reading.
The main character of the story I'm writing now has narcolepsy. All day
yesterday, and today, I've been exhibiting symptoms of EDS (that's
Excessive Daytime Sleepiness. I've been doing research for this. Wacky,
I know.). Now. I know I don't really have narcolepsy or EDS but it's
just funny how since I've been writing about someone who DOES, my brain
has been mimicking it.
Also. A certain four letter word that pertains to my story has shown up
twice in the past hour. (I can't say what it is because the story hasn't
revealed that aspect yet. Gah. Even saying this is, I feel, giving too
much away. Forget I said anything.)
In conclusion, I really am very tired.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Day One.
Done. And I'm feeling pretty good about it. (NaNo, that is.) Steph added the nifty little counter and NaNoWriMo icons. Which hopefully are visible now. The table entry from a few weeks back was making them show up at the bottom of our screens, but I know people use different browsers, so your mileage may vary, as they say.
Anyway, I managed to finish my first chapter AND the prolouge and get in 17...something words. I believe it's 1725, but not absolutely sure. Either way, impressive. Even better, though, is the fact that I'm pretty happy with it. There are things in there that are all foreshadowy and clever. Like when you read Harry Potter (or any good book, really) and then at the end go back and see that there were clues there all along. Good stuff, man.
Of course, like I was telling Steph, the fact that I've been carrying this story along with me for nearly a decade probably helps. [tongue]
So. It's pretty late now, but I'm not tired. Sigh. All day long I was exhausted beyond belief. Now that it's time to go to sleep, I don't want to. Oh well. Better force myself to get some rest. Tomorrow is another day.
Anyway, I managed to finish my first chapter AND the prolouge and get in 17...something words. I believe it's 1725, but not absolutely sure. Either way, impressive. Even better, though, is the fact that I'm pretty happy with it. There are things in there that are all foreshadowy and clever. Like when you read Harry Potter (or any good book, really) and then at the end go back and see that there were clues there all along. Good stuff, man.
Of course, like I was telling Steph, the fact that I've been carrying this story along with me for nearly a decade probably helps. [tongue]
So. It's pretty late now, but I'm not tired. Sigh. All day long I was exhausted beyond belief. Now that it's time to go to sleep, I don't want to. Oh well. Better force myself to get some rest. Tomorrow is another day.
Misc.
Lots of stuff to say, not really awake enough to say any of it.
It's freaking November! Holy year, dude! 2005 is nearly done. Unbelievable.
So. It's November, which means time to write a novel. Which means I'm going to write my epic Perth/Choset story. Really. I am. I just haven't started yet. Even though it's almost 9am, and I've been awake (ish) since four, and I've had the story idea in my mind for ...what, like 8 years now? Good god.
But I am going to write it this year. This month, even. Heh.
Oh. There was one last boq that I didn't answer. It was a long one, though, and, you know, I don't think I feel up to answering it right now, either. Sorry, word count.
Speaking of word count. And of NaNo - I believe that I will be posting my story here for everyone to enjoy (or, you know, not). The unknowable factor - do I post it all in one big clump, or should I do chapters? I'm thinking chapters. Yeah. So, in December, that's something to look forward to.
Church sign wisdom!! (The church near our house has updated it's marquee again. [it was actually changed a few weeks ago, and I'm just now getting around to remembering to blog about it])
One side reads:
EXPERIENCE GIVES THE TEST FIRST AND THE LESSON LAST
and the other side says:
ANY CREW MEMBER CAN STEER THE COURSE WHEN THE SEA IS CALM
So now you know. And knowing, as they say, is half the battle.
Um. I don't know what else. I think that might be everything for now.
Bah. That's only 275 words. I need to write 3332 words a day. (1666 a day for Nano, and 1666 for my blog. Although, really, I only need to write 1666 words a day for the rest of the year. It's like doing Nano twice. In a row. So I really ought to focus more on Nano. And other things. I mean, my novel is important, but ...now I'm just blathering.
In conclusion, I Don't Know vember.
It's freaking November! Holy year, dude! 2005 is nearly done. Unbelievable.
So. It's November, which means time to write a novel. Which means I'm going to write my epic Perth/Choset story. Really. I am. I just haven't started yet. Even though it's almost 9am, and I've been awake (ish) since four, and I've had the story idea in my mind for ...what, like 8 years now? Good god.
But I am going to write it this year. This month, even. Heh.
Oh. There was one last boq that I didn't answer. It was a long one, though, and, you know, I don't think I feel up to answering it right now, either. Sorry, word count.
Speaking of word count. And of NaNo - I believe that I will be posting my story here for everyone to enjoy (or, you know, not). The unknowable factor - do I post it all in one big clump, or should I do chapters? I'm thinking chapters. Yeah. So, in December, that's something to look forward to.
Church sign wisdom!! (The church near our house has updated it's marquee again. [it was actually changed a few weeks ago, and I'm just now getting around to remembering to blog about it])
One side reads:
EXPERIENCE GIVES THE TEST FIRST AND THE LESSON LAST
and the other side says:
ANY CREW MEMBER CAN STEER THE COURSE WHEN THE SEA IS CALM
So now you know. And knowing, as they say, is half the battle.
Um. I don't know what else. I think that might be everything for now.
Bah. That's only 275 words. I need to write 3332 words a day. (1666 a day for Nano, and 1666 for my blog. Although, really, I only need to write 1666 words a day for the rest of the year. It's like doing Nano twice. In a row. So I really ought to focus more on Nano. And other things. I mean, my novel is important, but ...now I'm just blathering.
In conclusion, I Don't Know vember.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)